The Panther, the Wizard, and the Laundry Chute
For all of you who enjoy my stats-related posts, here are some of my dumb cartoons. Yes, I know they suck. Yes, I know I can’t draw/Photoshop/be funny. Oh well. Click to enlarge.
(Source for original scale pic)
This irks me
<rant>
Three (or four?) of my friends on Facebook have posted this picture within the past 5 hours. Posting it here to rant.
The thoughts that went through my head, in order, when I saw this:
- Oh yay. A guilt trip. There’s nothin’ quite like a guilt trip from Facebook.
- Wait a minute. Facebook shouldn’t be giving me guilt trips, period. Stop it.
- Ugh, there are so many things wrong with this message, though!
- So to look like that I can only eat in public (under a shroud of shame, of course)? Is that all I have to do? No like, you know, exercise or weight training or steroids or tanning lotion?
- And if I desire food when I’m alone, I’d better make damn sure it isn’t anything more than lettuce leaves and the microbes that live on them! Is that right?
- Fuck. I could do that—I could eat only lettuce and lettuce microbes—and still not look like her. Have these people ever heard of genes? Specifically those that say “you’re going to grow up short and stocky and no matter what you do you won’t turn you into a model”? ‘Cause I’ve heard lots of people have that gene.
- Is it wrong that I’m offended by this picture/caption, seriously? Does that make me one of “those people”?
- At the same time, is it wrong that this makes me feel guilty?
- I don’t think I’m alone in this sort of contradictory thought process, though. Please tell me I’m not the only one.
- I think things like this are the reason why Americans can’t have normal relationships with food/body image/reality. “You’ve got to look one specific certain way and we’re going to oversimplify the steps you need to get there. You’ll feel worthless after you don’t get the same result in a short period of time. You’ll have a donut. You’ll feel guilty. You’ll realize how dumb that is. You’ll feel guilty about feeling guilty. You’ll stop caring because it doesn’t matter anyway, now does it? You’ll realize that it does matter if you want to be taken seriously in this society. So you’ll seek out some medium that will tell you what you need to do to look that one specific way.” Rinse. Repeat.
- If I actually “wore” what I ate I’d have a broccoli wardrobe.
- I’d be okay with that.
- And what about the stuff I eat in public? Does that only appear in private? Does the reverse side of this horrible, horrible logic apply in Horrible Horrible Logic land as well?
- Also: yes, she’s pretty, but not every guy/girl/whatever finds that particular body type attractive. When will people learn this agsdhslksdfjaldkjgalkfdlkjsfaisea.
Put us all in pretty little boxes. That’ll make us happy people.
</rant>
Benford’s Law? More like Benford’s LOL
Okay, today’s going to be a quick little blog ‘cause I’m busy trying to organize/transfer/protect from any possible massive hard drive failures my music library. It’s stressing me out.
While I was working on the “References” section of a textbook today at work, I noticed a pattern that I’ve come in contact with several times: there appeared to be a lot more “entries” that started with a letter from the first half of the alphabet (A – M) rather than the latter half (N – Z). I’ve done at least one other analysis regarding this topic, but I decided to do another slightly different one to see if it applied in this case.
QUESTION OF INTEREST
So what is Benford’s Law? For those of you who don’t want to click the link (lazy fools!), Benford’s Law states that with most types of data, the leading digit is a 1 almost one-third of the time, with that probability decreasing as the digit (from 1 to 9) increases. That is, rather than the probability of being a leading digit being equal for each number 1 through 9, the probabilities range from about 30% (for a 1) to about a 4% (for a 9).
What I want to see is this: is there a “Benford’s Law” type phenomenon for the letters of the alphabet? That is, do letters in the first half of the alphabet appear as the first letter of words more often than letters in the latter half of the alphabet?
HYPOTHESIS
In a given set of random words, a greater number of words will start with a letter between A and M than with a letter between N and Z.
METHOD
Using this awesome little utility, I generated (approximately) 5,000 words each from The Bible, Great Expectations, and The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. I then counted how many words there were starting with A, how many words there were starting with B, and so on for each letter of the alphabet.
I then did two other breakdowns of the letters:
A) I divided the alphabet in half (A – M and N – Z) and counted the total number of words for each group.
B) In order to “mirror” a sort of Benford’s Law type of structure, I divided the 26 letters into nine groups (eight groups of three letters each, one group of two letters). I wanted to make a similar breakdown of groups to the nine numbers that Benford’s Law applies to, just to see if that sort of arbitrary screwing around did anything. Visualization ‘cause I suck at explaining stuff when I’m in a hurry:
Kay? Kay.
RESULTS
I made charts!
By letter:
By “half of the alphabet” in what is probably the most worthless visual ever:
By semi-arbitrary group (dark blue) with Benford’s percentages by number (light blue) for comparison:
DISCUSSION
Well, that whole thing sucked. Okay, so obviously it’s not a perfect pattern match and I didn’t do any stats (I WAS IN A HURRY) to see whether there was any statistical significance or anything, but it was fun to screw around with for an hour or so. I wonder how different the results would be (if at all) if I were to use truly random words from the English language, not just random words selected out of three works of fiction. Perhaps material for a later blog…?
END!
Teehee. Friends.
I wanted to dedicate the whole of yesterday’s post to my good friend leaving Moscow, so this stuff is going in for today. And technically, most of this stuff DID happen today, so HA.
Dear Matt, Maggie, and Max: I love all you fools. It was awesome to hang out with you, chug sugar shots, make fun of large milkshake straws, be social nuisances in Shari’s, and be social nuisances in Ghormley Park.
And draw presidents with boobs.
For those of you who weren’t there: that’s Viking Lincoln being ogled by John Wilkes Booth. There was a little more added to this drawing after taking this pic, but it was inconsequential to the pic’s overall awesomeness.
Anyway, I’m 99% sure I’ll be back in Moscow at some point in life (all roads lead to Moscow…), at which point we all must hang out again.
WOO!
The Boastful Little Toaster Boasts the Most Toast
I got lost in Brink Hall today. Just like old times.
Anyway, I have a super cool idea for an R project that will involve a lot of frustration graphing. It will involve heat maps and crossword puzzles…that is all.
In the meantime…
3801. Who is your favorite Lord of the Rings charater and why?
I’ve neither seen nor read any LotR (and don’t intend to). However, seeing as how the next 15 questions are so are about the series, I’m just going to make some crap up like I know what I’m talking about. Okay? Okay.
3802. In the Lord of the Rings…how do the characters go on when the forces against them are so powerful?
Do Hobbits have powers? If so, powers. If not, PO-TAY-TOES.
How can they go on when so many awful things have happened?
Boil ‘em, mash ‘em…(yes, this IS the only LotR reference I know. It IS LotR, right? ‘Cause I’m fully prepared to reference this at least two more times).
3803. What is it that makes Middle Earth worth saving?
It’s the crème filling between the two hard cookies of Lower Earth and Upper Earth.
3804. Is Frodo making a personal sacrifice by taking the ring to be destroyed?
Only if it’s his ring. I’d be pissed if I found a cool ring and had to burn it/throw it in a pit/incinerate it with soul power/whatever the hell he’s supposed to do with it.
3805. What would you do in Frodo’s place?
Go reincarnate some dodos, just so I could run a farm called Frodo’s Dodos.
3806. When you saw the two towers did you really want the Ents (Treebeard etc.) to get involved in the war?
Sure, why not?
3807. Why didn’t Merry and Pippin just allow the Ents to take them home to the shire?
‘Cause the Ents were too busy making fun of Pippin’s name.
What could two tiny hobbits do in a great war?
Advocate tiny peace.
3808. Why did the elves go to Helm’s Deep?
They weren’t having fun in Helm’s Shallow.
3809. Who is the most heroic LOTR character and what makes them a hero?
Stevie. He’s heroic because he has to deal with Hobbits.
3810. What characters in LOTR put their own interests before the interests of all?
Petey. DAMN YOU, PETEY!
What characters put the interests of all above their own interests?
The unselfish ones, I would think.
3811. Aragorn left the elvish girl he loved. How could he leave someone he loved?
Frodo stole their engagement ring.
Isn’t love the highest thing that there is?
It’s not higher than Upper Earth.
What could he possibly have valued higher than love that he left her for?
Tacos. Everybody loves tacos.
Do you agree with him?
Damn straight.
3812. What LOTR character displays the most humanity?
The PO-TAY-TOES
3813. What did you notice that was different between the Two Towers book and movie?
The first involved reading. The latter involved watching.
3814. Why is Frodo so kind to Gollum?
‘Cause Frodo’s a nice guy?
3815. You are in Helm’s Deep on the eve of battle. Do you put on a suit of armor and fight, or crawl into the caves and hope to be protected?
I hop in the Batmobile and zoom out of there as quickly as possible.
3816. What have you risked your life for?
PO-TAY-TOES–okay I’m done.
3817. With the constant threat of violence, war, nukes, terror, chemicle weapons, etc. aren’t we all in a similar position to those in the Lord of the Rings?
You callin’ me a HOBBIT?!
3818. How can we go on when the evil in this world is so powerful?
Out of sight, out of mind.
How can we go on when so many awful things have happened?
Repression is a powerful thing.
3819. What is it that makes our Earth worth saving?
Good question.
3820. Who’s responsibility is it to save our world?
Ours!
3821. Who was more technologically advance in LOTR, the ‘good guys’ or the ‘bad guys’?
The neutral guys. They have Apple products.
3821. What was Tolkien saying by causing the Ents (trees) to come together with the river (by breaking the dam) and over throw Sauromon?
Haha, flashbacks to Howard the tree in Fallout 3. Weirdest. Quest. Ever.
3822. Should Wormtoung have been killed?
That sounds like a Pokemon.
Should Gollum?
From what little I’ve seen of Gollum, he’s obnoxious.
Why or why not?
However, nobody should be killed because of that.
3823. In the battle for Middle Earth, which LOTR character would you most like to be like and why?
I’d like to be the guy who wins.
3824. Which character do you think you actually WOULD be the most like?
Gollum’s obnoxious, so I’d probably be him.
3825. What is the overall ___ that you took away with you from this movie?
lesson or message?
It doesn’t matter if you’re hobbit or human…potatoes rock.
feeling?
Warm fuzzies.
**End LOTR**
THANK GOD.
3826. Why do most people associate being spiritual or connected to the world as being a hippy?
Do they?
3827. Why is passion and honest emotion equated with hallmark cards?
Are they? The only thing I think of when I think of Hallmark cards is my dad.
3828. What words set off alarms in your brain?
I have an alarm in my brain? Why the hell doesn’t it go off when it’s time for me to get up in the morning?! Slacker brain.
3829. Are you dancin in the dark?
Haha, I should, given how I dance.
3832. Is hell REALLY other people?
Sartre was spot-on.
3833. Or would it be more hellish to live totally without other people?
No. No it wouldn’t. Hell = other people.
3834. Legos or linkin logs?
Legos, fool!
3835. What books have you read more than once?
I actually haven’t re-read a book in a long time, what with my trying to finish my 200 Books list. Though I did re-read The Caine Mutiny for like the fortieth time a few years back.
3836. Do you get different things out of reading a book a second time a year or more after reading it the first time?
Of course.
Is it because you are a different person after time passes?
Yeah, in a way. You’ve acquired more knowledge about the world and are able to reinterpret the book in a different light given what you now know.
3837. The person who goes to ____ is not the same person who comes back. Fill in the blank with anything you think fits.
Band Camp.
3838. Quick! Empty your brain here!
No! My brain contents are staying right where they are tonight, thank you.
3839. What’s the best movie soundtrack?
Apollo 13.
3840. Tissues with or without aloe?
Without.
3841. Are you on any medication?
NO! And never again.
3842. Does any part of your own body disgust you?
Pretty much all of it.
If yes, isn’t that odd? What could have caused that feeling of disgust with your own body?
Not odd. Human nature.
3843. Want some popcorn?
Nah, not right now.
3844. What if Atlas shrugged?
Then maybe Ayn Rand would have fallen off the planet.
3845. Who has led the most interesting life?
The Most Interesting Man in the World, of course.
3846. What movies are coming out next year that you are looking forward to?
I have no idea and I don’t care. Not a big movie person.
3847. If someone is half man and half dog is he his own best friend?
Sure. Heck, he can lick his own butt now.
3848. Paper or plastic?
Paper.
3849. Why did things make sense in childhood, but they don’t now?
Things made sense in childhood?
3850. Is it crazy time?
It’s always crazy time with Claudia.
3852. If there were no laws and no rules name 3 things you would do that you don’t/wouldn’t/can’t do now?
1. Stay home all day and do stats/play Fallout/acquire music
2. Nakedness all the time
3. Public orgies!
3853. It’s a costume party. What will your costume be if the theme is:
the 70’s?
Something with lots of colors.
80’s?
Glam rock! That’d be awesome.
Under the sea?
Sebastian!
3854. Have you ever wanted to release the lobsters from those tanks in restraunts and put them back in the sea?
Yes! Every time we go to Red Lobster. Which is not often. But every time we go to Red Lobster!
3855. How funky is your chicken?
Pretty funky.
How loose is your goose?
Not as loose as a moose.
3856. What’s your favorite animal out of these: emu, otter, duck billed platypus, moose, skunk?
Skunk. They’re pretty and I can’t smell their stink, so why not pet the hell out of them?
3857. priest, rabbi, or other religios leader, a judge, or a sea captain to perform your wedding?
Sea captain!
3858. Do you think that it’s okay for people to write their own wedding vows?
Why wouldn’t it be?
3859. Rank these as places to be married. 1 = best.
Your House or Yard
5
The Beach
3
A Park
7
Disneyland
4
A Forest
10
A Catering Hall
6
Las Vegas
9
A church or temple
11
A Courthouse
8
On a Boat
2
On a Space Station
1
3860. The Earth is doomed. A giant asteroid is headed our way. It will decimate the planet in 3.2 days. You and your family own a space pod and you have room for 7 people from the list below. Everyone else dies. Who do you pick?
Orlando Bloom, Justin Timberlake, Joan Jett, John Denver, Baby Eve (the first human clone), Jennifer Lopez, Johnny Depp, George W Bush, David Bowie, Charleton Heston, Ralph Nader, Moby, Jeff Bridges, Kelly Osbourne, Frank Zappa, Bill Clinton, Britney Spears, Osama Bin Laden, The Pope, Eminem, Madonna
Aren’t a few of these dudes already dead? I pick…The Pope, Bill Clinton, David Bowie, Moby, John Denver, Madonna, and…why not? Bush.
3861. Rank the following dead people in order of who you would like to spend the day with. 1 = you’d like to hang out with them the most.
Joan of Arc
4
Groucho Marx
2
John Lennon
3
Joey Ramone
8
Anton Levay
10
Tupac
11
Jack Kerouac
5
Aaliyah
9
John F Kennedy
1
Lucielle Ball
7
Jim Morrison
6
3862. If you could grant immortality to one person you know (can’t be yourself) who would you give it to?
Whoever wanted it and was the first to ask for it. Any takers?
3863. If you could grant immortality to one person who you do not know personally but know of (writer, politician, etc) who would you give it to?
Probably no one. Immortality would be a pretty crappy thing to have bestowed on you if you didn’t want it. There really wouldn’t be anything you could do about it, either.
3864. Name a person you love:
Leibniz
Name a person you admire:
Sean
Name a friend:
Matt!
Name a relative:
Aunt Vicki
If you had to condemn one of them to death to save the lives of the others who would it be and why?
Well, Leibniz is already dead, so does that count?
3865. Would you rather be one of Santa’s elves or a dentist?
Haha, for a second there I thought that read “would you rather KISS one of Santa’s elves or a dentist?” I’d rather be a dentist. I’d probably rather kiss one, too. Good oral hygiene and all.
3866. When you first meet people what do you talk to them about?
Depends on the people and the context.
3867. You have been invited to a party with any sports team in the world. Which one?
This would be like the least exciting thing to ever happen to me.
3868. Finish the sentences.
In a world where:
Avril Lavigne rules
He was:
A boy
She was:
A girl
Together, they were:
Pretty obvious
Why do so many movie trailers start off by saying ‘In a world..’?
Because it adds DRAMA!
3869. Make up a superhero with really unhelpful powers:
Captain Apathy and his sidekick Meh.
3870. A couple of days ago this guy won 14 million dollars and tried to donate 1 million to the salvation army. The salvation army turned the money down saying they didn’t want dirty gambling money.
Did they do the right thing?
I don’t know about right vs. wrong, but I think they did a foolish thing. He (hopefully) didn’t’ acquire the money illegally, so why is it “dirty”?
3871. If you had a spare million for charity work who would you donate it to?
Probably the Humane Society.
3872. What’s the craziest most shocking moment of rock and roll history that you can think of?
I have no idea.
3874. What kind of punishment do you feel the following crimes deserve:
premeditated murder?
Life sentence. I’d say capital punishment for this and the next, but that seems so inefficient and ineffective the way we have it now that it wouldn’t be worth it in my opinion.
date rape?
Life sentence.
drug sales?
Illicit drug sales?
Jail. Community service.
drug use?
Again, illegal drugs? If illegal, jail time + possible rehab. If regular, party times and required sharing.
burglary?
I can’t remember the difference between robbery and burglary. Burglary is actually just the breaking and entering portion of “I’m going into this dwelling to steal stuff!” isn’t it? So jail. Community service. Having to pay for the damages.
3875. If you could kiss anyone in the world on midnight at new year’s eve, who would be the lucky one?
Do they have to be living?
3876. You have just taken two sexy people prisoner because they found your hide out and you think they are spies. What do youd do: kill them, hump them or have crumpets and tea?
This is the best survey question EVER.
3877. What is your new year’s resolution?
Stop being an idiot. It’s not going so well.
3878. Should the U.S. focus more on the threat from N. Korea or Iraq?
Antarctica. The penguins are ANGRY!
3879. Would you ever have plastic surgery?
Sure.
3880. How can George Bush be considered a Christian when he a war-monger and the ten comandments say do not kill?
Good question. Ask a Christian.
3881. What is the most inetesting premise for a reality tv show that you can think of?
I thought that dream I had a few weeks back about “Neil and Prey” was a pretty awesome premise idea.
3882. Who is the Hollywood Star next to die of a drug overdose?
Hopefully none of them, but the odds of that are pretty much zero.
3883. Do you find yourself caring a lot about online people, even if you haven’t met or spoken to them off of the computer?
Yup.
3884. When you hear the song puff the magic dragon what do you think?
Pete’s Dragon. Just ‘cause.
3886. What does ‘boo’ mean dn how did it become a slang word of affection?
I don’t know, but I find it a pretty obnoxious slang for some reason.
3887. How often do you stretch?
NEVER!
3888. Have you ever wished that you didn’t have to be yourself?
All the freaking time.
3889. Would you rather wear shoes full of earthworms or a hat full of spiders?
Earthworms. That would feel cool!
3890. What are some things that for most people go unsaid?
“I love you.”
3891. I said, ‘Play me the best song in the world.’ You put on:
Sleepyhead. Are you kidding? Though this and this are gaining plays like none other for me.
3892. What happened last year that you would like to forget?
Pretty much everything.
3893. What are you not able to do alone?
Be with others.
3894. Do you feel more connected to earth air fire or water and why?
I always used to think I had power over the wind, so I guess I’ll have to say “air.” I’m an air sign, too, after all…
3895. Which two words belong together and why: life, seawater, chocolate, blood, hair piece
Life and seawater, because the former probably originated in the latter.
3896. If con is the opposite of pro, what’s the opposite of progress?
Old joke is old.
3897. Have you ever wanted to meet the inspectors with the numbers for names(i.e. inspected by 36)?
Meh.
3899. If you could change 1 thing you did in the last 24 hours, what would it be & why?
I would have gone and exercised today. Was too depressed this morning to do anything.
3900. What is the most bizarre thing you’ve ever done?
Um. Do you know me?
Massive Levi’s, Sam!
DUDES.
This is one of the greatest things I’ve heard in awhile.
Badass Coldplay song + badass Dethklok lyrics = extra super badass song.
Is it sad that this…calms me? I’ve listened to it on repeat for about 20 minutes now and I’m really chilled out.
Now we just need Nathan Explosion singing the Duncan Hills Coffee Jingle to the music of Paradise.
I’ve got no internet!
So we’ll do what I always do for blog posts when there’s no internet access: post random old MSN Messenger quotes! These are like from 2007/2008.
>> You can want all you want, but if you can’t, you can’t
>> Jesus is indeed environmentally friendly
>> I AM CAPTIAN PHALLUS
>> My cat seems to enjoy following me around when I’m naked
>> Start chewing rocks!
>> Aneel, why do people suck?
>> So I’m making little Leibniz/Kant political posters, ’cause I’m bored and they’re cool
>> “Leibniz Kant”
>> Haha. Well. That’s not so positive, is it?
>> I think stress makes me awesome at statistics
>> Well, it’s my own fault, I’ve never masturbated
>> I’m sure all the great philosophers debated free will and determinism half-naked, it just makes more sense
>> oh, and can you think of some random household items, or really any random items… non-electric
>> You mean like spatulas and stuff?
>> God, I picked a phallic symbol…
>> “Where are my 25 credits? WHERE ARE THEY?!?”
>> College is fun except for this Locke paper
>> I feel empty inside
>> But now I have 2.90 GB of free space
>> Boobs are the first image results I get for the search “tubular” in Google Images
>> That’s awesome
>> What would be even more awesome would be a site like http://www.checkoutthisgirlscaboose.com and then have full of pictures of female heads and torsos attached to real cabooses or something
>> Now I’m trying to resist finding a picture of a naked girl, a picture of a caboose, and opening Photoshop
>> We were walking to Shari’s and he goes completely out of the blue, “it would be so cool to just embed glitter into the pavement on the street”
>> And I go, “what if there was a wind storm and all the glitter got picked up?”
>> Then, “what if an F5 tornado ripped through a Midwestern glitter factory and killed a bunch of people with glitter shards?”
>> And, “wait, what the hell is glitter really made of?”
>> So we decided it was made of chopped up Midwestern hicks
>> Wow, this DVD player hates life
>> It likes to sound like it’s eating the DVDs
>> *nom nom nom* “Where’s your director’s cut now?!” *nom nom nom*
>> Hit him with the STICK, you BASTARD!”
>> I’m just so excited I can spell “vagina” using the elements
>> Oh god…it’s…it’s German country music…
>> If I had three puppets and Lil’ Jon in my window, I’d be hyper, too
Also, it feels good to walk (for exercise) again. Tucson’s too ungodly hot for walking now, plus now that I have a job I can’t spend 6+ hours a day walking around the city. My cardio exercise has been confined to gunning it on the stationary bike at the Y as of late. Not that that’s bad, but I have butt calluses from it and for some reason I can’t zone out biking like I can when I walk. So today I went 18 miles and it felt fantastic (except for my little toes which are covered in blisters).
Life is Pietzsche
It’s an art!
I don’t know if I like this one or not. I think I would like it better if I’d not outlined the whole big heart in purple and let the colors at the bottom “bleed” into the outline.
I have an insane urge to paint right now, too. Watercolor. I usually hate watercolors ‘cause mine never turn out well. Perhaps a trip to Michael’s is in order tomorrow…
Also, sorry these have gotten so short all of a sudden. Not sure what’s up with that.
Don’t like product placement? Try an ice-cold Coca-Cola instead!
In my 100 Things list, I mention my constant singing of the Frosted Flakes “Hey Tony!” song when I was younger. Here is one such instance.
How these theatrics didn’t get me a paid endorsement job with Kellogg’s is beyond me. There’s a whole 60-minute tape of me doing crap like this.
Also, I still have that shirt. It was the “uniform” I got in T-ball when I played it in first grade.
SOCIAL ACTIVITIES
Ah. Socialness.
I miss having friends. Not like you guys aren’t still my friends…I guess I mean I miss having friends I can physically hang out with. Screw around town in the car with. Get naked with.
Well, I’m back in Moscow until Saturday. Hope to see you sillies at some point!
And until then, I leave you this, courtesy of Sean:
Tell me you didn’t at least smile. We laughed for like 15 minutes.
Travellin’
If I were to rank the places I’ve been in terms of how much time I’ve spent there, it would go as follows:
- Moscow, ID
- Vancouver, BC
- London, ON
- SeaTac International Airport
Seriously. 99% of the time I fly, I have to fly through Seattle. 99% of those times, my layover is 3+ hours. Today, it was about 4 ½. It’s cool, though. I like that airport. They’ve got these awesome rocking chairs in the main food court thingy and they face a huge window looking out at all the runways/planes. They also rotate the artwork exhibits that are in the terminal hallways quite often, and they’re always pretty great.
ANYWAY.
I’m headed to Moscow! I’m actually in SeaTac right now; I’ll be home in three hours or so. Our old gang needs to get together and “party” in the basement.
And now I’m going to work on some stats stuff. I slacked off majorly and didn’t start my Stats Weekly posts at the beginning of the year (for various reasons); I’ll try to get it up for the midpoint of the year.
Vroom!
Camp NaNoWriMo is so happening this year.
When it comes to fiction, I haven’t written anything of substance for quite some time. That bothers me. But I also have a bunch of ideas running around in my head, so that’s a good thing and something worth being optimistic about.
THEREFORE!
I’ve decided to do an exercise in writing pieces of short fiction. I found this list of themes awhile back and saved it, hoping to use it for a writing project sometime. I’ll utilize it now!
Rules:
1) All themes must be written about.
2) The total words per story has to range between 50 and 1000 words.
3) At least one story per week must be written, starting the first week of June.
To make story length/themes chosen as objective as possible, I numbered the themes 1 – 131 in alphabetical order. Then I used R to create a list of 130 numbers, all between 50 and 1000. These numbers were matched up to the list of the alphabetized themes, and then THAT list was randomized to determine the order in which I’ll write about them.
It’ll be fun!
If anyone wants to do this with me, I’ll post my newly-created list here (I’ll actually post it anyway; it’s just not on the Flash drive I’ve got with me right now).
And I may or may not post the writings on here…depends on if they’re any good or not.
SATURDAY WHERE ARE YOUUUUUUU?
Random internet quiz party time!
1: Chakras!
According to this, I:
- Am fearful and nervous
- Am stiff, unemotional, and not very open to people
- Am passive and indecisive
- Am cold and distant
- Have no problems expressing myself
- Have good intuition with a tendency towards fantasy
- Am unprejudiced and aware of the world and myself
Yay?
You have to enter your email, but I haven’t gotten any spam from them yet.
Highlights from my summary (aka, the stuff with which I agree):
Your scores indicate you have BANKER/INNOVATOR tendencies. Your unique dominant BANKER core energy causes you to rely upon the following strategies for success and fulfillment. Your cornerstone core value is knowledge, supported by your strong desire to create justice in the world. Having the right information is important to you. You work diligently to gather resources together and save them. You like steady, solid situations with limited change. Life is easier when people and things are reasonably similar. Chaos is your enemy. People and situations should measure up to commitments. When things get messy, you may get testy. You surround yourself with facts, figures and data. Once started, you don’t give up easily. Creation without effective written plans and process description is senseless. Having all of the information is important to you, even the small things. You dislike any waste of resources. You like to be the one who knows; being right and being able to prove it is important to you. Your unique secondary INNOVATOR core energy supports your dominant BANKER core energy.
Your second cornerstone core value is wisdom. Understanding and compassion are central to your life strategy. Strategic thinking is your forte. You see and understand the relative worth of people and things. You can always see another way to put things together. Complicated situations and problems are not a threat to you. Finding the best solution is one of your primary contributions. The power of bankers is in their clear rational processes. They are organized to the nth degree. Banker/innovators are generally quiet, knowledgeable, resourceful, self-directed and steady people.
I’m bored.
Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaablog
I want Saturday to be here NOW. Survey to help pass the time.
1. Which TV character do you think you are most like?
I have no idea. I don’t think I watch enough TV (or at least a wide enough variety) to find a character I’m like.
2) What time do you go to bed?
As late (early?) as possible while still being able to get up for exercise before work. So around 3 to 4 AM.
3) What was the last meal you made from scratch?
Does salad count? I chop everything up myself, I never buy the little kits.
4) What is your favorite type of music?
Anything with a monster beat and a good chorus. Lyrics don’t really matter.
5) In what position do you sleep?
On my right side. Though I usually FALL asleep on my back.
6) What is your first memory?
I remember getting chicken pox, but I don’t know if that’s my earliest memory. I also remember sticking these letter stickers all over EVERYTHING in one of our first houses. Don’t remember my age then either, though.
7) What is your least favorite smell?
Couldn’t tell you that one.
8) It’s your round at the pub and your friends asked you to surprise them. What drink would you buy and why?
Vodka gimlets. Aside from those Smirnoff apple-flavored thingies, this was the only alcoholic thing I’ve ever liked.
9) What was the last thing you read/watched that made you cry?
I can’t remember, believe it or not.
10) They say that you learn something new every day. What was the last thing you have learned?
A new function in R. Had to create a vector of randomized numbers in between two specific values.
11) Which Literary love interests would you snog, marry and avoid.
Snog: Jay Gatsby
Marry: Phileas Fogg
Avoid: Hmm…that’s a tough one.
13) Paperback, Hardback or e-reader? Which of these is your favorite reading format and why?
Paperback. Though I’ve never actually tried an e-reader. Hardbacks are heavy/awkward and I always end up wrecking the dust jacket. Paperbacks are light, easy to carry around, and I don’t have to be paranoid about breaking them (at least easily).
14) If you could bring back any canceled TV series for another run what would you pick and why?
Chicago Hope, ‘cause that show was AWESOME and unfortunately got overshadowed by ER back in the day.
Crowin’ it
Happy birthday, mom! Sorry I kind of turned today into a Let’s All Get Depressed party tonight. Unfortunately, that’s the only thing I’m good at sometimes.
However, this shall possibly cheer you up: my new favorite meme.
It’s like Lame Pun Coon, but even lamer. And punnier. And therefore it’s awesome. I’d pick a favorite but I giggle like an idiot through each page, so I don’t think I can.
What proportion of praying mantises are atheists?
SCREW YOU depression, I’m trying to be a functioning adult.
Didn’t go work out this morning. Instead, curled up in bed and cried for two hours.
I wonder how many calories despair burns.
I also forgot to pack my broccoli/hummus for snackies at work, though, so maybe that’ll balance some of it out.
Stupid.
Not even watching the new Metalocalypse episode (once I finally dragged myself out of bed) cheered me up, even though it had the most badass ending ever.
Blah.
Maybe posting old recently-discovered pictures from senior prom would cheer me up?
(Me, Amy, E’raina, Tanna, and Aneel, left to right, on my back porch)
(Amy had so many wardrobe issues that night)
(I lost approximately 10 pounds of glitter off that dress while dancing that night and yet it still sheds excessively)
Meh. Aneel in a martini apron is still pretty awesome.
Happy Mother’s Day!
Shoutout to my super awesome amazing mom! I love you so much!
On a related note: I don’t know how many of you out there watch the Colbert Report, but a few months ago Stephen did an interview with the (now late, RIP) Maurice Sendak, author of Where the Wild Things Are. I highly advise you watch part 1 and part 2 if you haven’t yet, ‘cause they’re hilarious.
Anyway, in the second part of the interview, Stephen read Mr. Sendak a children’s book he himself wrote entitled I Am A Pole (And So Can You!). He got a blurb from the children’s author (“The sad thing is, I like it!”) and promised that as soon as he got a publisher, the book would be out for purchase.
Well, Stephen Colbert being Stephen Colbert, he announced a week or so ago that IAAP(ASCY!) would be released on May 8th.*
My mom and I both thought Stephen’s book hilarious, so I decided to buy her a copy for Mother’s Day. It’s longer and has more illustrations than the version he read on the air, and the little extras on the jacket sleeves and the additional pages are pretty great as well. Plus, all proceeds from the sale of his book (and the audiobook version) go to USVETS, a non-profit organization dedicated to returning troops.
So if you’re looking for a cool little gift for someone or think Stephen Colbert is awesome, go get a copy of this book. It’s pretty rad.
*Coincidentally, this is the day that Mr. Sendak passed. Freaky, eh?
Adventures in R: Creating a Pseudo-CDF Plot for Binary Data
(Alternate title: “Ha, I’m Dumb”)
(Alternate alternate title: “Skip This if Statistics Bore You”)
You may recall a few days ago during one of my Blog Stats blogs I mentioned the problem of creating a cumulative distribution function-type plot for binary data, which would show the cumulative number of times one of the two binary variables occurred over some duration of another variable.
Um, let’s go to the actual example, ‘cause that description sucked.
Let’s say I have two variables called Blogs and Images for a set of data for which N = 2193. The variable Blogs gives the blog number for each post, so it runs from 1 to 2193. The variable Images is a binary variable and is coded 0 if the blog in question contains no image(s) and 1 if the blog contains 1 or more images.
Simple enough, right?
So what I was trying to do was create an easy-to-interpret visual that would show the increase in the cumulative number of blogs containing images over time, where time was measured by the Blogs variable.
Not being ultra well-versed in the world of visually representing binary data, this was the best I could come up with in the heat of the analysis:
If you take a look at the y-axis, it becomes clear that due to the coding, the Images variable could only either equal 0 or 1. When it equaled 1, this plot drew a vertical black line at the spot on the x-axis that matched the corresponding Blogs variable. It’s not the worst graph (and if you scan it at the grocery store, you’ll probably end up with a bag of Fritos or something), but it’s not the easiest-to-interpret graph on the planet either, now is it?
What I was really looking for was some sort of cumulative distribution function (CDF) plot, but for binary data. I like how Wiki puts it: “Intuitively, [the CDF] is the “area so far” function of the probability distribution.” As you move right on the x-axis, the CDF curve lines up with the probability (given on the y-axis) that the variable, at that point on the x-axis, is less than or equal to the value indicated by the curve. Assuming your y-axis is set for probability (mine isn’t, but it’s still easy to interpret). This is all well and good for well-behaving ratio data, but what happens if I want to do such a plot for a dichotomously-coded variable?
There were two ways to go about this:
1) Be a spazz and write some R code to get it done, or
2) Be an anti-spazz and look up if anybody’s written some R code to get it done.
I originally wanted to do A, which I did, but B was actually a lot harder than it should have been.
Let’s look at A first. I wanted to plot the number of surveys containing images against time, measured by the Blogs variable. Since I coded blogs containing images as 1 and blogs not containing images as 0, all I needed to get R to do was spit out a list of the cumulative sum of the Images variable at each instance of the Blogs variable (so a total of 2193 sums). Then plot it.
R and I have a…history when it comes to me attempting to write “for” loops. But it finally worked this time. I’ll just give you that little segment, ‘cause the rest of the code’s for the plotting parameters and too long/bothersome to throw on here.
for (m in (1:length(ximage))){
newimage=ximage[1:m]
xnew=sum(newimage)
t=cbind(m,xnew)
points(t,type="h",pch="1")
}
ximage is the name of the vector containing the coded Images variable. So what this little “for” loop does is create a new variable (newimage) for every vector length between 1 and 2193 instances of the Images variable. Another new variable (xnew) calculated the sum of 1s in each newimage. t combines the Blogs number (1 through 2193) with the matching xnew. Finally, the points of t are plotted (on a pre-created blank plot).
So. Wanna see?
Woo!
So I actually figured this out on Wednesday, but I didn’t blog about it because I wanted to see if I could find a function that already does what I wanted. Why did it take an extra three days to find it? Because I couldn’t for the life of me figure out what that type of plot was called. It’s not a true CDF because it’s not a continuous variable we’re dealing with. But after obsessively searching (this is the reason for the alternate title—I should have known what this type of plot was called), I finally found a (very, very simple) function that makes what this is: a cumulative frequency graph (I know, I know, duh, right?).
So here’s the miniscule little bit of code needed to do what I did:
cumfreq=cumsum(ximage) plot(cumfreq, type="h")
The built-in function (it was even in the damn base package. SHAME, Claudia, SHAME!!) cumsum gives a vector of the sum at each instance of ximage; plotting that makes the exact same graph as my code (except I manually fancied up my axes in my code).
Cool, eh?
Maybe I’ll post my full code once I make it uncustomized to this particular problem.
I Caught a Touch of the Random
One of these months, soon
I’ll post a blog in haiku.
How cool would that be?
In other news, I am really, really digging this song:
It’s got this amazing (sometimes not-so) subtle impending sense of apocalypse to it, just in terms of the music, not even the lyrics. Love it.
And on a completely unrelated note, I’m posting this here because I had a freaking dream about Rebeca and I laughing over it (we never watched it together, but she’s the one who linked to it like three years ago on Facebook):
This was the funniest thing I’d ever seen back when I watched it during an extremely sleep-deprived grad school week.
COLORZ
Oh my…the colors…what is this I don’t even…
I want those arm sleevy things and rainbow bow that first model’s wearing.
This looks like the most fun thing ever. 2:06? I would wear that 24/7, indecency laws be damned.
Also, Superbass is enhanced supremely by the addition of stringed instruments.
BLOG OVER!
Oh gross
Invincible bug attack!
So what is it with me and random insect infestations? I try to be super careful about leaving nasty-smelling stuff around with my anosmia and all. And half the time it hasn’t even been my fault (the flies in the house, the fruit flies in Van, the mice (even though those aren’t insects, shut up, they were crawling up out of the floor)).
So now I’ve had these itty bitty moth-like creatures living in my sink drain for about half a week. Their population had grown to the point where about 20 or so would fly up out of the drain whenever I turned the water on, so something had to be done.
Using an old mascara wand and fighting off the warrior bugs sent out to deter me from destroying their little nest, I successfully remove a freakishly large wad of hair (not mine—it was blonde) from the sink. This causes like 100 more bugs to flip out and start flying around my bathroom like little fighter jets, so I re-plug the sink with a paper towel while I go downstairs in search of bleach. I couldn’t find any, so I used the next best thing: Windex. Which apparently gives this particular species of bug super powers. I poured a cup or so down the drain and the mightiest of the winged things (like 100 more of them) rose up in a frenzied death-driven kamikaze mission to take me out. Which was fun, especially considering I had nothing to swat them with but the bottle of Windex and a roll of paper towels.
So I also dumped a bunch of nail polish remover down there and then plugged the drain back up with a paper towel. Then I killed as many of the ones still flying around as I could, shut my bathroom door, plugged the bottom draft thingy with a towel, and haven’t been back in there since.
Fun and exciting times.
Survatorium
That’s Latin for “oh god, when the hell is Claudia going to be done with this infernal 5,000 question survey?” (Answer: soon, young followers. Soon.)
3701. If you HAD to do your holiday shopping for EVERYONE in only ONE store what store would you pick?
The Dollar Store. Totally. Who doesn’t want glow sticks for a present? Communists, that’s who.
3702. What’s more annoying: the person in front of you driving ten miles under the speed limit on a regular day OR a person who cuts you off doing 10 miles over the speed limit on a stormy day?
Depends. Is it a 2+ lane road? If so, then the person speeding their butt off is more annoying. But if there’s only one lane and you can only pass like every 10 miles, then the person going slowly is obnoxious as hell.
3703. Define the word TIME without using the word time in the definition.
It’s a magazine!
3704. What old cartoons do you remember watching?
How old is old? I remember: Talespin, Eek!, 2 Stupid Dogs, Johnny Bravo, Dexter’s Lab, Ed, Edd, n’ Eddy. Some of those are quite a bit older than others.
3705. Do you think that people care only about the people they know personally or do most people care about all people?
I think we do have an ability to care for all people, especially when we’re reminded of our own humanity when natural disasters strike.
Why do you think people feel that way?
As obnoxious, selfish, and egocentric as we all seem, we’re all human. We care about our species.
3706. Are you more like Bra,k Zorak, or Space ghost and why?
Oh god, flashbacks to watching Space Ghost Coast to Coast and being too young to understand what the hell was going on. So I’m not really sure.
3707. Would you rather see the movie first and then read the book or read the book and then see the movie?
I’d rather just read the book. Most movies ruin something or other that’s important.
3708. Do you own any audio books?
They’re not technically audio books…
What?
I own a 2 hour long recording of brown noise. I own Brian Regan’s LIVE! and a recording of his I Walked on the Moon. OH HOLY FREAKING CRAP I just realized now that I’ve got 500 GB of external hard drive, I can finally download The Great Gatsby as audio. I adore that book.
3709. Why are things the way they are?
Deterministic universe!
3710. Do you believe that guns don’t kill people and that people kill people?
Yes.
Why?
Because ascribing the ability to kill to inanimate objects that would NOT kill unless acted upon is stupid. For example, snow doesn’t kill people, but snow acted upon by forces causing mass amounts of it to barrel down a slope in an avalanche does (assuming there are people below it, of course).
3711. What is the best way you can think of to prevent murder?
Stop killing people. GENIUS!
3712. Why is it that in the USA thousands of people are murdered with a gun each year while in Canada only a handful of people are murdered with a gun each year?
Because the entire population of Canada is roughly equivalent to the population of California. I wonder if the gun murder rates would be closer if the populations were more similar.
Incidentally, have you ever been to Surrey? That’s where probably 90% of Canada’s gun murders occur.
Sure sounds like the USA is doing something wrong, but what?
MAKIN’ BABIES! Also Republicans.
3713. Is there a difference between really being yourself and just being automatic and acting on whims?
If you’re not yourself on “automatic pilot,” who are you?
3714. Have you ever strolled through a graveyard?
Yes.
In the dark?
Yes. My apartment was practically surrounded by graveyard in Vancouver. Canadian ghosts, eh?
3715. What is the difference between a good poem and a bad one?
I don’t like poetry.
3716. Who really cares about anything?
Me.
Do you?
I just told you!
Do you let it show, all the time?
That would be indecent.
3717. Do you live with passion?
Sometimes. Sometimes I have no will to live at all.
3718. Do you talk to squirrels?
I don’t like squirrels.
3719. Do you kick up leaves?
Fall is fun.
3720. Which do you need more: sugar, caffeine, alcohol, drugs, sex, sleep?
I don’t think any of these would help me out.
3721. What images do you get from the phrase ‘human subway’?
A flashback to a Craigslist personal I read in 2009 in which a guy was describing how much he hated women’s personal ads because they all listed qualities they were looking for in a dude as if they were building a man at Subway’s “create a man” station.
3722. Joe Strummer died. Are you sad?
Should I know who that is?
Do you have a fond memory of him to share?
Obviously not.
3723. If you are a guy are circumcised?
Not a dude.
If you are a girl which do you prefer circumcised or not?
Um…I don’t know.
3724. Does it bother you that in the USA you will be tracked based on what web sites you visit, what online purchases you make and your email will be read by the government?
It bothers me, but doesn’t surprise me. Worse things could be happening.
3725. Have you ever checked out the online personals?
Indeed. Scary things be on teh internets.
3726. What do you crave?
Excitement, awesome data, awesome data analyses, sugar.
3727. On a scale of 1-10 how tough are you?
Physically? 8.
3728. On a scale of 1-10 how tender are you?
3?
3729. On a scale of 1-10 how good are you?
8.
3730. On a scale of 1-10 how evil are you?
I hope a 1.
3731. What would make a cool coffee table book?
“1,001 Pictures of Naked Leibniz Doing Calculus”
3732. What’s the most interesting conversation piece in your home?
To me? My mega stats book of awesomeness. To others? Probably the TV. It’s big.
3733. If you could get on the mall loud speaker on christmas eve you would say, ‘Attention holiday shoppers:
“Why are you still shopping on Christmas Eve? Go home and ‘nog it up!”
3734. What are you on the outside of looking into?
Sanity.
3735. Are you more of a peculiar purple pie man or a sour grape?
Hahaha what?
3736. Who is someone you know should deserve more respect?
My mom.
3737. Does the end ever justify violence as a means?
I don’t know, really. I don’t think I could know from my experience.
3738. Care about everything, or care about nothing? Which would be worse?
Caring about nothing.
3739. Why do so many people on the internet pretend to be pregnant?
Um…I had no idea this was an issue.
3740. Have you ever been the diary Hicks or Brian (same guy, Hicks is the old diary, Brian is the current one)?
I’m assuming you’re wanting to actually ask if I’ve read it, not if I’ve been it. Either way, no.
3741. What was your new years like in (answer all that you can remember)
1970?
Not alive!
1980?
Still not alive!
1990?
Was alive for this one! But I was like two so I don’t remember.
1995?
I was like seven, so I don’t remember.
1998?
10 years old! I probably watched the ball drop on TV.
2000?
I wanted to be quirky so I watched the ball drop on TV while standing on my head.
2006?
Probably just watched the ball drop on TV. Again. I live an exciting and fulfilling life, I do.
3742. You know the Def Leopard song, ‘Love Bites’?
No.
Do they actually mean love bites as in it sucks, or lovebites as in hickies?
I don’t know, I’ve never heard it.
3743. All you want for Christmas is:
A new life.
3744. If you rearrange the letters in SANTA what words can you make?
“Satan,” of course. Do I get to make smaller words, too?
3745. Say anything:
“Anything.”
3746. Can you feel your life ending one minute at a time?
Unfortunately not.
3747. Is there something you don’t want to talk about?
Yes.
3749. Who would you stop the world and melt with?
A certain someone. You know who I mean.
3750. Is there anyone you wish you had never known?
Meh.
3751. Do you prefer to drive or be driven?
Depends on who’s driving.
massage or be massaged?
Massage.
pamper or be pampered?
Pamper.
go down or be gone down on?
Hahahahaha.
3752. What do you think of the sims?
Freaking love The Sims.
3753. How about the Sims Online?
Never played it.
3754. Professional or home pedicure and why?
I’ve never had a pedi. I’d go professional, though.
3755. Is there a difference between overweight and over fat?
Durh.
3756. What do you think of Rush Limbaugh?
Oh don’t get me started.
3757. Do you buy books and then never read them?
I try not to. Books rule.
3758. What does OPP stand for?
I don’t know, actually.
3759. If you had to be a character from married with children, what would you be?
I’ve never seen that show.
3760. What did you get for christmas?
A badass stats book, that’s what!
3761. What was your best ever valentine’s day?
2008. Actually, the day before was better, but whatev.
3762. What movie would you like to see again, that you haven’t watched since you were a kid?
I’d love to run through all the Disney classics again.
3763. Have you seen Fantastic Planet?
Indeed I have not.
3764. Do feet disgust you?
Not usually. They ARE pretty creepy, though, if you think about them.
3765. What pain releaver do you use?
MANLINESS. Or ibuprofen.
3766. Are you an artist, a designer or a doodler?
I’m a drawer. I’m in between a doodler and an artist. See pretty works here.
3767. Do you belong to a gym?
I’m a member of the Y.
3768. Have you ever been to court?
Only in a play.
Over what?
It was by Ayn Rand, though, so that hardly counts as anything.
Did you win?
I won the shame of being involved in something associated with Ayn Rand.
3769. Would you ever take a case on court TV (Judge Judy and such)??
Nope.
3770. You are given a million dollars, only you MUST spend it (or as much as possible) IN ONE MONTH. ANY LEFT OVER MONEY WILL GO AWAY. WHAT DO YOU BUY?
CAPS LOCK MAKES THIS SERIOUS! I’d give a great majority to my mom and close friends (does that count), I’d buy my own place + car, I’d buy a ticket to Antarctica, I’d buy a lifetime license to SAS, I’d buy as many awesome pieces of colorful clothing as possible.
3771. What are your pj’s like?
An orange shirt with the Kix cereal logo thingy on it. Panties.
3772. Is there a fabric you love above all other fabrics?
Does polyester count? Hahaha. I’m tacky.
3773. Can you think of any words (besides mom, dad and bob) that spell the same thing backwards and forwards?
Poop, kayak, this one news anchor’s last name down here, tenet, rotavator. Also, did you know that aibohphobia is the fear of palindromes? And did you know that palindromes are rasemordnilap?
3774. Who would enter an ugly foot contest????
Probably people with ugly feet.
3775. Would you rather see a movie with someone who screams during the movie, crys through the movie, or talks theough the movie? What’s the least annoying?
I would rather not go see a movie. HA!
3776. Do you have any grey hair?
On occasion. But I also have occasional red hairs as well.
3777. Are all the Jennifers you know psychotic?
Do I know any Jennifers?
3778. Do you want to join a country club?
No.
3779. ‘I felt a funeral in my brain’ – Emily Dickinson. What do you feel in your brain?
Disdain for you for making me read Emily Dickinson.
3780. What is the best atari game you can remember?
I wasn’t gaming back in the Atari era.
3781. Hulk Hogan, Alf or Mr T?
Mr. T!
3782. Did you dance today?
No.
3783. Are birds happy in cages?
Probably not.
Are pets happy indoors?
Depends on the pet. Some cats seem extremely content just chillin’ in the sun streaming through the glass door.
3784. Have you, or has anyone you know, ever been stuffed in a locker?
Yeah. We busted up the locker pretty badly, too.
3785. Critique this poem.
Last night death signed my yearbook
Have a good summer
he said
see ya next year
and then I realized it wasn’t my yearbook
it was my tombstone
That’s deep, bro.
3786. Red or white wine?
Apple juice.
3787. Hula hoops or jump ropes?
Jump ropes.
3788. Do you like tiffany lights?
I don’t even know what those are.
3789. Do you like fights?
Not particularly.
3790. What do YOU want to pin the tail on?
That sounds…dirty.
3791. Wasn’t last night fun?
No. Go die.
3792. Have you ever met a group of more interesting people?
As compared to who?
3793. Would you eat Spaghetti with waffles to keep from offending someone?
That sounds insanely gross. Who is this person and why would avoiding spaghetti + waffles offend them so?
3794. Do you play with Mr Patatoe head?
Did Dan Quayle write this survey?
3795. Would you rather live in an attic or a basement?
Oh god, no more basements.
3796. Can you understand sign language?
Some. Not enough for conversation at all, though.
3797. Do you wear ridiculous hats?
No.
Does Elton John?
Probably.
3798. What music is wild and crazy?
This noise. Best workout song ever.
3799. How does one live their life like a candle in the wind?
By setting their hair on fire and standing in a wind tunnel.
3800. Ziggy and the Spiders or Benny and the Jets?
I’ve never hear either, actually.
Big Week o’ Blog Stats Celebration, Day 6: The Best of the Best of the Best, SIR!
It’s the last day of the big statistics marathon. Sad? I am. But I got a few new R projects coming, so you’ll be subject to those shortly.
Anyway. Today is less about stats analyses and more about just general naked-eye trends. What questions we’re looking at today:
A. What are my most popular blogs by view count on WordPress?
B. What are some of the most popular search terms people have used to arrive at my blog?
C. What are some of the most hilarious search terms people have used to arrive at my blog?
D. Blogs/topics I think are worth sharing that didn’t make my Best Of list up top.
Part A.
I’ve been on WordPress since September 1st, 2010. Since then, my most viewed blogs have been:
- (153 views) Scrabble Letter Values and the QWERTY Keyboard
- (149 views) Colored Beats!
- (58 views) Oh look, PayPal wants me to fill out a survey
- (34 views) TWSB: Well, it certainly would make the cartographer’s job easier…
- (28 views) TWSB: Weebles Wobble (But They Wouldn’t if They Had Three Legs)
- (26 views) Pi vs. e
- (19 views) An analysis of statewise uniform population density (according to Craigslist)
- (19 views) Claudia’s 365 Days of Music – A Review
- (18 views) 5 x 20 seconds of fun
Those may not seem like tremendously large viewing numbers, but considering I’ve got over 2,000 posts and like three people who actually frequent Eigenblogger, 153’s not too bad. Part B explains some of the numbers.
Speaking of which…
Part B.
Top 10 search phrases are:
- “colored beats”
- “Leibniz porn”
- “what one thing could paypal have done to improve your experience with the account limitation process”
- le seul mot juste”
- eigenblogger”
- “scrabble letter breakdown”
- “scrabble letter values”
- “scrabble letters”
- “scrabble letter rank”
- “rho rho rho your boat”
Yes, a freakishly large amount of times my blog has been found have been because of somebody (sombodies?) searching for “Leibniz porn.” That is simultaneously awesome and confusing. Does “porn” mean something like “metaphysical texts” in some other language? If not, and at least one person out there is searching for legitimate calculus-oriented, ostentatious wig-wearing, best-of-all-possible-smut Leibniz porn, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU AND WILL YOU BE MY SOUL MATE FOREVER?!
Ahem.
Le Seul Mot Juste was the name of my blog up until like three months ago.
And “rho rho rho?” Who the hell knows. Maybe my intellectually-compatible-perfect-future-boyfriend-husband-thing (hereafter referred to as my ICPFBHT) was trying to make some sort of stats pun as he sat hunched over his computer keyboard in a darkened room, chugging Red Bulls and listening to electronica. Naked. With stacks of Leibniz’ works next to him.
*Sigh…*
Anyway.
Part C.
People have found my blog by searching for rather humorous things such as:
- “jokes about leibniz cookies”
- “analysis without anal”
- “paddled in parachute pants”
- “yo dawg science”
- “jokes about godot”
- “if your a noodle and you know it clap your hands” (yeah, I have no idea, either.)
- “ who the hell is millard fillmore”
- “gdrydfjgki”
- “gavagai turnips”
Part D.
It’s shameless self-promotion time! I was going to make a big ol’ flowchart thing that showed you what blogs to go for depending on your general interests, but I’m lazy and I’m sure none of you readers really care that much, so you get this instead.
Got here via a statistics-related post and/or are interested in random recreational stats parties? Why not check out my blogs under the Statistics category?
Interested in philosophy?
What about science?
(Want to read me bitch about stuff?)
Haha, that’s all I got. So there you go! Six days’ worth of stats for six years’ worth of blogs. I hope to entertain you all for another six years at least.
Thank you for reading! Seriously. I’m not all about acquiring followers, but it is really nice to have regular readers. :)
Eigenblogger 