Tag Archives: hooligan time
For some incredibly random reason, this little rhyme popped into my head this afternoon and I couldn’t get it out.
Did any of you guys ever sing this in elementary school? I remember G.E. and I sang it quite a bit. It was about as rebellious as you could get in a Catholic elementary school.
The “Missouri” version is most similar to what we sang.
Elementary school, man.
Playing Rock Band with Nate keeps bringing up all these memories of when my roommates and I would spend hours and hours and hours playing Rock Band back in the house. We took it seriously, yo. Examples of said seriousness:
- Playing for 14 hours straight. This happened a few times.
- Busting through the tour mode as fast as possible to earn tons of money, and then spending all evening customizing the outfits of our band members.
- That time the Xbox red-ringed on us and we spent approximately one hour Xbox-less before we NEEDED to go get a new one to play Rock Band.
- Sean getting drunk and trying to sing Ballroom Blitz in a Scottish accent.
- Lanky singing Metallica’s “Blackened.”
- Sean and I quoting relevant Metalocalypse quotes as we play (“I have musics dyslexkia…you know that…I…don’t likes to talk about it.”).
- Michael getting drunk and falling off the drumming chair.
- Rabbi Jeff, Aaron’s burly, mountain man-esque character who was (obviously) Jewish.
- Aaron making up random lyrics on the fly as he sang.
- Our “cutoff” system. At one point or another, I said that anything less than a 97% on a song was not good enough, so we set 97% to “cutoff.” We had a bunch of other things for other percentages as well. 100% earned a high five, 99% earned a limp fist bump (because you just didn’t try hard enough to get a 100%), 98% was an actual fist bump, 96% was “not even cutoff,” 95% was “not even not even cutoff,” a 69% meant that you had to kiss everyone else in the room (this never happened), and a score of 1% meant you had to have sex with someone in the room (also never happened). There were others, but I can’t remember them.
- Calling the drummer and singer the “drummist” and “singist,” respectively.
- Calling the guitarist and bassist the “guitarer” and “basser,” respectively.
- Lanky wailing “MARYANNE!!!” in an overdrive section of More Than a Feeling and us all subsequently failing out because we were laughing so hard.
- How FREAKING EXCITED we were when my parents got me Rock Band 2.
- Sean rocking out so hard with the guitar that he tipped the couch over (this happened several times).
- Breaking at least three of Michael’s chairs.
- All of us playing Metallica’s “Blackened” on expert and just barely making it through the song. I’d actually failed out three times, but the last time was right before the end, so we still made it.
- All of us giving very serious consideration to making a documentary about our fake band.
- Putting those little plastic bendable glow stick things all over the instruments and then rocking out in the dark.
So much fun.
I wanted to dedicate the whole of yesterday’s post to my good friend leaving Moscow, so this stuff is going in for today. And technically, most of this stuff DID happen today, so HA.
Dear Matt, Maggie, and Max: I love all you fools. It was awesome to hang out with you, chug sugar shots, make fun of large milkshake straws, be social nuisances in Shari’s, and be social nuisances in Ghormley Park.
And draw presidents with boobs.
For those of you who weren’t there: that’s Viking Lincoln being ogled by John Wilkes Booth. There was a little more added to this drawing after taking this pic, but it was inconsequential to the pic’s overall awesomeness.
Anyway, I’m 99% sure I’ll be back in Moscow at some point in life (all roads lead to Moscow…), at which point we all must hang out again.
Holy crap, I love you guys. Who needs therapy when you can sit in a dark car with three awesome friends and have a bitch fest about how much all of our lives suck? I’m keeping those videos forever.
Today’s song: Where I’m Going by Cut Copy
“I got boob tonight!”
Today’s song: Symphony 1 in The Barrel of a Gun by Emily Wells
GOD this is the most I’ve laughed in awhile (last time was when Sean was playing Viva Piñata. I’ve never seen him as stressed out as when he’s playing that game). We totally should have recorded the David Bowie’s Crotch song(s) and made and album. And the whole screeching into the mic for overdrive was too much. Loved it. I can’t believe my dad didn’t hear a decibel of that.
WOOHOO, BAND FRIENDS!!
It’s been awhile. We all need to hang out more before I disappear to the north and you all stay here.
We also need to take our clothes off together more.
But that’s nothing new.
We have a lot of magnetic words on our fridge. It was my goal over the break to write down all of our dirty sentences we had made over the semester. Here they are (I cited who wrote each sentence for each one I remember the author, so obviously there are a lot of mine, since I remember which ones I wrote):
“Fiddle my hot dirty pickle as I fondle myself in the shower.”
“This language is manipulated by us.” –Me
“Please friend, never incubate meat in our puppy.” –Michael (I think)
“Frantically nibble happy banana.” –Sean
“Come hit on me as I am madly cool and happy.” –Sean
“We only lie to you when it is time which it is always.” –Michael
“No men find my sturdy pants special.” –Me
“She is hot so we must screw.” –Me
“Throughout winter I will pretend to have power” –Michael
“Luscious brine woman shakes the pallid monkey prince’s huge torpid man pole and fiddles under his bed with candy girl’s mountainous bouncy breasts as she clubs the dark gardener’s apparatus.” –Aaron
“By repulsive I mean lovely.” –Michael
“This picture of the man is hot.”
“No one can can-can like I can.” –Me
“Live fast with no pants.” –Me
“Hump intoxicated.” –Me
“Cook my smooth pink part to introduce the flavor of galoshes.” –Me
“Gorgeous woman friend is your mother.”
“Silly butterfly tripped in the sky and falled.” –Sean
“Smile and know that I am always on top.” –Me
“Love is essential but is in desperate need of a knife at times.” –Michael
“Night breast.” –Me (this has now become our Rock Band band’s name)
“I scream for bare skin.” –Me
“Together those pecuniary drunks will teach dance.”
“Crave perfect cream.”
“Lick his pretty rod.”
“She would blow him but he has two white breasts, not two white balls.” –Me
“She is wonderful but only in the nude.” –Me
“Rain produced the wet morning.”
“Gimme violet velvet love muffin.” –Sean
“Think with your tool,
Such a nice, firm taco,
Always install tuna into my slot,
My vagina is private but my nipples are bare and stiff,
Together we have enough to nakedly sizzle big johnsons” –Me (don’t ask)
“Know balls like me.”
“Honey watch please as I ram this mad shaft through exquisite pudding.” –Sean
“Rub delicious instrument in good deep bush.” –Sean
“Enough trousers! I would like to have sex, and together we will.” –Me
“I enter your bush
With a soft gentle push
And as you bite your lip
You feel it in your slit
Is only the tip
And no room to put it.” –Michael
“Your tremendous pendulous apparatus is enormous and makes me full of passion, as I tremble and plunge into your delicious privates after whispering luscious language that penetrated your heaving bosom.” –Me
“Zip up your fly or I will go downtown and rock your package.” –Me
“Wet urges always smell.” –Me
“Go beg, then gush musk from your nasty mound.”
“There is no use for pants.” –Me (of course)
“Some like it on top.” (on freezer)
“Me? I like it on bottom.” (on fridge)
“Sadly I lick you as my dreams are crushed.” –Me
“I peeked in her slot and saw eternity…or pussy.”
“If you are gone, who will satisfy my wild urges?” –Me
“Languid pumping leaves me out of breath.”
Not a word shall be said.
I have recently been made aware of this:
But why wasn’t I ever told of these?!
I am now amused.
Good memories. Good memories.
And Matt, I can’t tell if you’re amused or disturbed during that last one.
“Have a kitty!”
Apologies to Dexy.
Ah, first football game of the year, and what an absolute bore the clarinet section is this year. Maggie, I miss you. I want to be up with you and Matt and Rob and all the other fun people up in the trombone/baritone section.
But enough about that!
Denny’s will never be the same. Tonight was awesome. Five us of go gadding about at 10 at night to Denny’s in Pullman. I had sugar. Melissa had a video camera. We were all pretty perverted. Fun times were had.
I must say, life is pretty good right now.
Except for math.