Category Archives: Life

Say Yes to the Stress

If you’re stressed about the future, clap your hands

*clap clap*

If you’re stressed about the future, clap your hands

*clap clap*

If you’re stressed about the future

And you don’t care about rhymes because you’ve got bigger things to worry about and you should be doing something more productive than blogging about stupid nonsense and trying to make light of your own panic but you can’t because you’re stressed and panicking and freaking out

If you’re stressed about the future, clap your hands!

 

 

(*clap clap*)

Three words:

I

am

garbage.

I SUCK AT LIFE

I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck I suck

I SUCK

[ [ [ [rage] ] ] ]

Do you ever have those days where you just want to sucker punch the universe?

That’s me today. I am angry. Almost irrationally so. Anytime I allow myself to think about what’s happened this semester, I just get so angry.

Probably too angry, since there’s not really anything I can do about it.

But UGH. It’s a draining feeling. I’m tired of feeling angry, but I have a hard time not feeling angry, you know?

BLAH.

[ignore this]

There’s something I’ve been meaning to blog about for…oh, about four years now. But I’ve never felt removed enough from this thing to be able to actually write about it.

But I feel like it’s almost time to just do it. Just write about it. It’s a big deal, it’s an important thing that’s happened, and it’s something that I haven’t ever really talked about to anyone. I’ve mentioned it in passing to a few people, but have never gone into any detail.

But I think it’s almost time to acknowledge it.

Anyway.

I’m not going to talk about it now, ‘cause I don’t want to just yet, but I just wanted you to know that there might be a pretty serious blog post in the near future.

So yeah.

Old Habits Die Hard

Or not at all.

I’m a horrible person.

TUANFUKFSD

Man, I just spent about an hour reading all my old emails between my UBC supervisor and myself.

I just logged on to that email to get info about an old account, why the hell did I decide reading all that crap was a good idea? I feel physically sick now.

Seriously. If I were to ever rank all the relationships I’ve ever had on a scale from “unhealthiest” to “healthiest,” that one would probably be the low point on the “unhealthiest” side.

That was not a fun time.

BRB, gonna throw up.

I am a CRAPFEST

Well, today was garbage. Panic attacks sure are fun, especially when they happen in the middle of the day while you’re at school and you have to go find the most private bathroom in the math building so that you can hyperventilate in peace.

Also, I’m saying “screw it” to NaNoWriMo this year. I’ve got school stuff to worry about and I’m not super in love with my story idea in the first place. Plus I’m pretty sure that I’d fail at it if I tried it, and I really don’t feel like failing at yet another thing right now.

Yay.

[ignore me]

A poem by Claudia:

I am worthless.
I am worthless.
I am worthless?
I am worthless.

I AM WORTHLESS

I
AM
WORTHLESS

I am

W
O
R
T
H
L
E
S
S
.

Worthelssworthlessworthlessworthless.

Worth
Less.

The end.

I will not let my insecurities rule my thoughts.

I will not let my insecurities rule my thoughts.
I will not let my insecurities rule my thoughts.
I will not let my insecurities rule my thoughts.
I will not let my insecurities rule my thoughts.
I will not let my insecurities rule my thoughts.
I will not let my insecurities rule my thoughts.

This has been another quality blog post brought to you by Claudia!

Milestone?

Guess what? I’m 10,000 days old today. I’m not sure if that sounds like too few days for ~27.25 years or too many.

Also, that means that if I’d started blogging the day I was born*, today I would finally have finished with my 10,000 Days project.

I’ll be 20,000 days old on November 4, 2042.

ANYWAY, that’s all you get today because I feel like garbage.

*One-day-old Claudia would probably have posted a blog of equal or better quality than 18-something-years-old Claudia, just sayin’.

 

A POST TO END ALL POSTS (not really.)

Here are some bullet points that apply to my life right now:

  • I live in Calgary
  • I’ve been keeping a daily record of my life for the past 8.75 years
  • I have a math degree
  • I have someone wonderful to love (and who loves me back)
  • I’m still in school
  • I am in a graduate program for statistics
  • I like teaching (statistics)
  • I like walking for exercise/pleasure

Ten years ago, I was in the midst of my junior year of high school. If you had told me even one of these bullet points was going to apply to me in ten years, I would never have believed you. If you had told me all of them were going to apply to me at the same time, I probably would have just laughed at you. But here I am, ten years later, and they all apply.

Hell, if you would have told me any portion of these points even five years ago, I probably wouldn’t have believed you.

Life is weird.

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Short Blog is Short

I’m scared of what’s to come.

*noises of frustration*

Guess who spent the afternoon in the hospital because of ridiculous panic attacks?

ME!

Aren’t you jealous?

FAIL

WHY AM I SO STUPID

OoOoOoOo

Tra-la-la-la-la, I wish my coping mechanisms weren’t so self-destructive. And I don’t trust Gritman, so fuck that nonsense.

(Sorry, ignore me tonight.)

Welcome to Mediocrity City. Population: Claudia

I am so fantastically stupid.

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[FRUSTRATION]

WHY
AM
I
SUCH
A
COMPLETE
AND
UTTER
FAILURE
AT
EVERYTHING
I
DO
EXCEPT
FAILING?