Tag Archives: history

Let’s Taco ‘Bout Love


I mentioned this to Nate a while back, but I figured I’d put it on here, too, just so that I’d maybe actually follow through with it.

I’m going to be 30 next year, which is…weird.* But anyway, I thought it would be kind of a cool thing to take Billy Joel’s We Didn’t Start the Fire and re-write it so that it covers the events of the last 30 years. Partially because the original song covers about 40 years and I don’t want to wait another decade, and partially because I’d like the challenge of rhyming “fuck, we elected Trump” with something.

So yeah, I’m going to try to do that by this time next year! Hopefully we won’t get Trump’d in the meantime.

*It’s not bad, just weird. I don’t mind the idea of aging, I just don’t feel like I’ve lived for almost 3 decades. I feel like I’m still 19 or something.


Alright you dude-machines, it’s time for a rant (and lots of caps lock).

(I’ve ranted about this like 238 times before, but it’s still important, so you have to deal with it.)

It really bothers me when people divorce mathematical theorems/proofs/lemmas/what-have-yous from the people who came up with them.

Like, I get it. The math on its own is obviously important. DUH.

But it really bugs the crap out of me when people are like, “why do we care about Such-And-Such who came up with the Such-And-Such Theorem? Just give us the math, yo!”


ALSO. I think knowing who/when/why/how someone freaking COMES UP WITH A THEOREM (or lemma or proof or whatev) can not only help someone better understand the reasoning/logic behind the theorem, but can also help put it into context with other possibly non-math events and maybe make it more relevant/understandable. Remember when I talked about how Kepler doubted the accuracy of the volume measure of a wine maker’s wine barrel and how that helped lead him on the path to figuring out a more accurate method of measuring the volume of such an oddly-shaped object? Not only is that an interesting tidbit of knowledge, but it helps give some context/background for the beginnings of calculus. It’s not necessary to understand the math, but I think it helps from making the math seem so removed from “real life” as it has a tendency to be if it’s taught as a bunch of formulas and Greek letters and “this will be on the test so memorize it” pieces of info.

In the key of C++

Check this website out.

Cool info for my birthday:

  • When you were born there were approximately 5,132,112,262 other people alive on Earth.
  • January 15th, 2001
    Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia, launches on the Internet over half your life ago!
  • 13th Feb 1988
    The opening of 1988 Winter Olympics held in Calgary, Alberta, Canada (you were 11 days old)
  • 9th Nov 1989
    The Berlin Wall falls (you were 1 year old)
  • 1st Oct 1992
    The Cartoon Network is first broadcast on television (you were 4 years old)
  • 10th Dec 1993
    DOOM, a science fiction horror-themed first-person shooter video game is released (you were 5 years old)
  • 22nd Nov 1995
    Pixar/Disney animated movie “Toy Story” is released (you were 7 years old)
  • 19th Nov 1996
    Microsoft’s Clippy is unleashed on the world with the release of Microsoft Office ’97 (you were 8 years old)
  • 14th Jul 2000
    A powerful solar flare, later named the Bastille Day event, causes a geomagnetic storm on Earth (you were 12 years old)
  • 24th Aug 2006
    The International Astronomical Union demotes Pluto which is no longer regarded as a planet (you were 18 years old)
  • 18th Nov 2011
    Minecraft, a sandbox indie game is published as a full release version (you were 23 years old)
  • Out of 100,000 people born on the same day as you, approximately 97,854 are still living.

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This Week’s Science Blog is Absolutely Cool


Here is a fascinating PBS documentary on the history of cold and absolute zero. I don’t really know what else I can really say here aside from WATCH THIS! Seriously, it’s really quite interesting.

Instant mood lifter

Hahahahah, oh my god.


Yay for Leibniz. Descartes’ is pretty good, too.



Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Hobos

I got this little message tonight at 6:25 from Nick on Messenger:

It’s a blasé day says: if you could be an historical figure—any historical figure from any time in history—who would you be?

This, of course, was a forefront thought in my mind all night (well, one of many). After several hours of careful deliberation, I present to you my top 10 list of historical figures I would like to have been in the past (most desirable listed first):

1. François-Marie Arouet (Voltaire)
Voltaire rocked. This guy was a freaking awesome writer with an incredible wit and ability to dodge censorship and confuse and insult his enemies. And I don’t care what you say—Candide was an awesome book. Overall, an extremely smart man and an awesome writer. I would love to have been Voltaire.
“I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.”

2. Sigmund Freud
Ah, yes. The father of talk therapy and psychoanalysis. Despite the controversy (or should I say the overwhelming popular opinion) that his theories were wrong, I strongly support Freud’s basic ideas and the idea of actually talking about problems to figure them out. I’ve also rather enjoyed his id/ego/superego construct for some time. Plus, after slogging through the 700-page “Interpretation of Dreams,” I have newfound respect for this man based solely on how long he can ramble.
“From error to error, one discovers the entire truth.”

3. William Shakespeare
Would have possibly been number one or two if it weren’t for the fact that he didn’t really come up with the ideas for his plays but rather adapted them from already existing stories. Not the biggest crime, of course, but still…knocks the Bard down a few pegs on my list. Still, though, I wouldn’t mind being considered the creator of such plays as “Hamlet” or “Much Ado About Nothing.”
“Be great in act, as you have been in thought.”

4. Thomas Jefferson
The author of the Declaration of Independence. What more needs to be said? Yes, yes, there was the whole hypocrisy thing with the slaves, but aren’t we all hypocrites in one way or another? This guy just happened to have his more publicized. Wouldn’t it rock to have authored the freaking Declaration of Independence? I think so, yes.
“I cannot live without books.”

5. Jean-Jacques Rousseau
A kind of counter-player to Voltaire, Rousseau wrote “Confessions” and basically started the Romanticism movement. How cool is that? And it talks about sex! And peeing! Back in the 1700’s! Scandalous! Also, he does a lot of work with political philosophy. If you can’t be Voltaire, you can be the guy he was pen-pals with.
“Man is born free, but everywhere he is in chains.”

6. Benjamin Franklin
Probably the horniest historical figure America has seen (Clinton aside, haha). Also, he was pretty much a renaissance man. What didn’t he do? Who didn’t he do? Franklin owns.
“Hide not your talents, they for use were made. What’s a sun-dial in the shade?”

7. F. Scott Fitzgerald
I love Fitzgerald and everything he’s written (at least, everything I’ve read that he’s written). His characters are really, really, awesome. I’ve done at least five biographies on Fitzgerald over the years, and all I can say is the guy is pretty damn incredible. All bow to the Fitzgerald!
“Sometimes it is harder to deprive oneself of a pain than of a pleasure.”

8. Albert Einstein
Good old Einstein. Would have been higher except I cannot fathom myself going, “Oh yeah, here’s the mathematical answer for mass-energy equivalence!” In fact, I can’t see myself coming up with the mathematical answer for anything, except maybe a bunch of fake proofs I came up with in 9th grade during math. Where was I?
“The important thing is to not stop questioning.”

9. Socrates
Okay. One, he was a philosopher. Two, he got executed for his philosophy. Three, his name is “Socrates.” The whole Socratic method thing? Awesome. An ‘A’ for you, Socrates!
“The unexamined life is not worth living.”

10. Aristotle
Wrapping up the list is Aristotle, the guy famous for saying, “if you get me mixed up with Socrates, I’ll beat you over the head with this Greek newspaper.” I don’t really have much to say here; another seemingly renaissance-type.
“Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work.”

The Second Continental Chatroom


This is my attempt to describe the events (or the night, more accurately) leading up to the Second Continental Congress in Philadelphia, as well as the writing of the Declaration of Independence, if the founding fathers had had computers, the internet, and a chatroom or two. Done in an hour.

Note #1: this is about as historically accurate as scientology is a credible theory, so keep that in mind while you read it (although some things that are thrown in there have some historical context). It’s mainly for entertainment.

Note #2: I tried to use “chatroom dialogue” for this thing. So that’s why like every third word is incorrectly spelled and/or an abbreviation.

Okay, that’s all. Enjoy!

The Second Continental Chatroom.
10 founding fathers.
2 chatrooms.
1 hell of a ride.

Here’s the key to the names:
GeorgeW = George Washington
Hancocky = John Hancock
AllAboutTheBenjamins = Benjamin Franklin
Tom = Thomas Jefferson
JMad = James Madison
John1776 = John Adams
Sammy = Samuel Adams
Alex = Alexander Hamilton
Liberty1000 = Patrick Henry
Sensible1 = Thomas Paine
TheKing = King George

>>>>>>>Logging on: Chatroom25<<<<<<<..:namespace prefix = o ns = “urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office” />

(AllAboutTheBenjamins signed on)

(GeorgeW signed on)

(Alex signed on)

(Tom signed on)

AllAboutTheBenjamins: Testing, testing…

GeorgeW: hello?

(John1776 signed on)

(Liberty1000 signed on)

(Sammy signed on)

John1776: is it working

Alex: yeah it is

Liberty1000: hi guyzzzzzzzzzzzz

(JMad signed on)

(Sensible1 signed on)

Sammy: awesome invention ben :P

Tom: yeah best so far

AllAboutTheBenjamins: Thanks guys

AllAboutTheBenjamins: I call it the “chatroom”

AllAboutTheBenjamins: I stole the patent from the English :P

John1776: lol

JMad: oh noes!

Sensible1: Haha

Alex: ho hum

Sammy: wat do we do now

(TheKing signed on)

TheKing: Teh King is hear!

AllAboutTheBenjamins: Uh-oh

JMad: its geourge

John1776: lol brit

Tom: hi geourge ;)

TheKing: shut up I don’t hvae a u in my name

Sammy: why r u folowing us around

Sammy: give us space

TheKing: stop running awy from me

TheKing: y arnt we friends anymore

Alex: cuz ur anoying

TheKing: no im not

Tom: yes you are

John1776: u keep telling us wat to do

John1776: and wont leave us alone

John1776: stop it

TheKing: shut up im the best guy youll ever meet

TheKing: im the kign

John1776: yea right

TheKing: >:(

TheKing: no!

TheKing: I am teh king!

TheKing: I rule!

TheKing: I rule!

TheKing: I rule!

TheKing: I rule!

TheKing: I rule!

TheKing: I rule!

TheKing: I rule!

TheKing: I rule!

TheKing: I rule!

TheKing: I rule!

TheKing: I rule!

AllAboutTheBenjamins: Wow, he’s getting annoying.

Alex: k guys lets move 2 a diffrent room

Tom: k

(Alex signed off)

(AllAboutTheBenjamins signed off)

John1776: alrite

(Sensible1 signed off)

(Tom signed off)

(John1776 signed off)

GeorgeW:  byebye gourge

(GeorgeW signed off)

(JMad signed off)

(Liberty1000 signed off)

Sammy: :P


(Sammy signed off)

TheKing: DAMN

>>>>>>>>Logging on: Chatroom05<<<<<<<<<<

(Alex signed on)

(John1776 signed on)

(AllAboutTheBenjamins signed on)

Alex: this is much better

(JMad signed on)

(Sammy signed on)

AllAboutTheBenjamins: Indeed.

(Sensible1 signed on)

(Tom signed on)

Alex: where’d pat go?

John1776: I dunno we mustve lost him

(GeorgeW signed on)

Alex: omg gorge is so dum

John1776: No kidding lol

GeorgeW: :(

Alex: No not you geogre

Alex: teh other 1

GeorgeW: o okay

John1776: ur teh cool george

GeorgeW: thx <3

JMad: btw did you see aaron today

John1776: lol ya

John1776: those socks where so stupid

JMad: ill give u 10 virginia dollars if u shout burrs a grrl next time u see him

John1776: lol deal

Alex: god i hate him

Alex: i wish i could shoot him

John1776: lol ur so vilent

Alex: hey he deserves it

John1776: youd prolly be the one 2 die, lol

(Liberty1000 signed on)

JMad: hey patrick

JMad: pat pat patty pat patrick patty pat pat pat patrick patricio pat patty fat pat patty patrick pat pat patty pat

Liberty1000: what

JMad: hi :P

John1776: lol

Tom: so ben wat did u do over in france

AllAboutTheBenjamins: The question SHOULD read, “WHO did I do over in France”

Sensible1: :O

GeorgeW: (  . Y . )

Liberty1000: omg u seriussssssssss

AllAboutTheBenjamins: ;)

AllAboutTheBenjamins: You know what I say

AllAboutTheBenjamins: “Girlies in bed and girlies when rise makes life healthy and full of surprise”

John1776: lol

John1776: u mite wanna change that for teh public

AllAboutTheBenjamins: I probably will

AllAboutTheBenjamins: What rhymes with “girlie?”

Tom: surly

Sensible1: Burly

Alex: curley

GeorgeW: early

Liberty1000: twirrly

AllAboutTheBenjamins: “Early” sounds good; I’ll try that

John1776: your so lucky ben i wish i could go to france

John1776: but abby would kill me

Sammy: lol

JMad: *whip crack*

John1776: :( tahts not nice

JMad: sorry

(Hancocky signed on)

Alex: uhoh guys better behave

Alex: hancocks online</span>

John1776: oh crap lol

Hancocky: WTF IS UP GUYZ

Alex: lol hi john

AllAboutTheBenjamins: Hey Johnny


Hancocky: HEY JOHN ADAMS  

John1776: lol hey john hancock


John1776: np

Sensible1: hey hancock wanna get a smaller font

Hancocky: NO

Hancocky: I LIKE IT THIS WAY         

Sensible1: w/e

Sensible1: Why are you so obnoxious, john?

Hancocky: WTF PAINE

GeorgeW: yea dude

GeorgeW: you think your so hi and mighty just cuz your writing a book

GeorgeW: anyone could do that

Tom: i wish i could write something good :(

JMad: awwww poor t.j.

John1776: u can write good tom

Sammy: we <3 u Thomas

Tom: aw thnx :)

JMad: btw sam what do you have going on in your basement

JMad: ?

Sammy: nothin

JMad: liar

JMad: i kno you have beer lol

Hancocky: OMG WHERE

JMad: Sammys got beer in his basement

Alex: holy crap sam adams beer rocks

GeorgeW: u should pee in a bottle and sent it to geourge

John1776: lol

Alex: i h8 geourge

Alex: >:(

Sammy: me too

AllAboutTheBenjamins: I think we need to lay down the law with him.

Alex: definitely

Hancocky: TOTALLY

Tom: yes

Tom: it becomes nesessary for one people to disolve the political bands which have connected them with another

Tom:and to assume among the powers of the Earth the seperate and equal station to wich the laws of nature & of natures god entitle them

Tom: a decent respect to the opinons of man kind requires that they should declare the causes with impell them to the seperation

Tom: :P

GeorgeW: wow

JMad: dude write that down

Tom: haha, sriously?

<P class=MsoNormal style=”MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt”>Sammy: ya

John1776: do it

Alex: and add more

Tom: k


John1776: yea write down all the crap hes done to us

Alex: ^ this

Tom: k what has he done

AllAboutTheBenjamins: He appointed those judges that were completely biased

JMad: those damn brit soldiers everywhere

JMad: can’t get them out of my house


John1776: that doesnt stop u

John1776: lol

Alex: Taxes!!


Sammy: i had to go back to england to go on trail

Sammy: sea sickness and all

Liberty1000: I’m boreed

Liberty1000: somebody talk 2 me

Sammy: l8r

Liberty1000: pleeeeeeeeeeeeeez

Liberty1000: pm me

Sammy: no were busy

Liberty1000: Give me a pm or give me death!!!11

Hancocky: DUDE SHUT UP

Alex: ya seriously u say that about everythign

Liberty1000: I do not

AllAboutTheBenjamins: You said it about my bran muffin the other morning

AllAboutTheBenjamins: I gave it to you too because I thought you were being serious

John1776: lol

Liberty1000: fine then

(Liberty1000 signed off)

Tom: k anyways wat else has he done

Tom: ?

JMad: remember when we all had 2 go to england for that stupid meetign

JMad: that counts

GeorgeW: he keeps overrulling our laws

Tom: k one sec

Tom: allright its done

John1776: tom ur teh 1337



Hancocky: I CALL FIRST

Sensible1: I dont know why youre all getting excited about what he’s writing

Sensible1: I mean all of its just common sense

JMad: Paine, stfu

John1776: lol paine

John1776: ur all about the common sense crap

Sensible1: Hey its a good idea

Sensible1: Its better then toms stupid thing


GeorgeW: seriously

JMad: i say we send paine to give this to geourge

Sammy: second dat

Sensible1: This is ridiculous

(Sensible1 signed off)

John1776: lol

(TheKing signed on)


GeorgeW: oh ****

Tom: haha hi geourge :P

JMad: hey geourge, asl?

TheKing: wtf

JMad: *takes off wig and outer tunic*

John1776: lol

TheKing: u guys r sick

Alex: I <3 YOU GEOURGE!!! 

TheKing: ew

Sammy: hey geourge

TheKing: wat

Sammy: ur tea sux

John1776: lol

Hancocky: OMG BURRRN

TheKing: u guys are rediculous

Tom: hey gourge we have something to show you

(>TheKing received Declaration.doc from Tom<)

TheKing: u will all regret this

(TheKing signed off)

AllAboutTheBenjamins: Hooray! He’s gone!

Alex: bring it on king…we got the cool george

GeorgeW: :)


Alex: ya

Sammy: i can brign some beer

AllAboutTheBenjamins: Where should we go?

Alex: theres taht old building in philadelphia

GeorgeW: ok cool

Tom: k

John1776: see u there guys

(John1776 signed off)

(Sammy signed off)

AllAboutTheBenjamins: Alright, I’ll be there

(Tom signed off)

(GeorgeW signed off)

(Alex signed off)

JMad: me too

(AllAboutTheBenjamins signed off)

(JMad signed off)


(Hancocky signed off)</font>

(Liberty1000 signed on)

Liberty1000: guyzzzzzzzz

(Sensible1 signed on)

Liberty1000: where did u all go

Sensible1: Hello?

Liberty1000: paine!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Sensible1: Oh god no

(Sensible1 signed off)

Liberty1000: hello

Liberty1000: dangit

(Liberty1000 signed off)

The End…or is it?

MY NEXT PROJECT (in other words, no one else is allowed to do this): chronicle all of U.S. history using the chatroom format. After that, possibly, is the Bible chronicled using chatroom format.