Hey college students!
Y U no mask?
Covid isn’t gone, people. And Covid likes crowds.
I know it’s easy to think you’re invincible when you’re young, but I am SHOCKED at how few people are wearing masks now that it’s not mandatory. This includes professors – how can y’all feel safe going into a lecture hall of 200+ students without a mask? Or even worse – going into those crowded hallways as classes change?
I don’t get it.
Distance
Hahaha, I accidentally saved this treadmill distance of an astonishing 114.8 feet.
FREAKING MARATHON RUNNER RIGHT HERE
(Sorry, the semester’s starting tomorrow and I’m nervous as all hell about it as always.)
ACCUMULATE
So here’s that “running total” graph animation that I’ve been doing for the past few years showing my cumulative walking/running miles. Now updated for 2022!
It wasn’t even a contest last year. 2022 was up top like 99% of the time. Hell, 2022’s total surpassed 2015’s END OF THE YEAR total on June 16.
Let’s see what this year does!
I wasn’t planning on bringing this decrepit toenail into the new year and yet HERE WE ARE
What the hell is this?
What the hell is this?
Why is it still attached?
How is it still attached?
I’d set it free, but it’s SO SECURELY ON THERE that there’s no way.
And it’s too thick to trim, so…
UGH.
Book Review: Waiting for Godot (Beckett)
Have I read this before: Yes. Couldn’t tell you when, but I’ve read it before.
Review: I…I didn’t enjoy this as much as I remember enjoying it the first time. I remember being much more amused and intrigued when I read it before; this time I was not as invested. I don’t know why. Maybe I had built the story up in my mind to be more than it actually is. Who knows.
Favorite Part: One thing I did still like was the pacing. This moves along at a good clip but, at the same time, seems to not move at all due to where the play is set and how little actual motion occurs during it. It’s an interesting contrast and makes things more interesting.
Rating: 5/10
Book Review: Travels with Charley (Steinbeck)
Have I read this before: No.
Review: This is Steinbeck + dog Charley traveling across the US in a camper. It’s basically the great American road trip with a lot of reflection about the state of America and the American people. He makes sure to note the differences in the people and cultures from state to state, especially as he hits the Midwest and then the West. It’s a summary of the flaws of a country and its people from someone who’s really good at describing the flaws of a country and its people.
Favorite Part: A few good quotes:
“I have always heard that Maine people are rather taciturn, but for this candidate for Mount Rushmore to point twice in an afternoon was to be unbearably talkative.”
After getting a flat tire: “It was obvious that the other tire might go at any moment, and it was Sunday and it was raining and it was Oregon. If the other tire blew, there we were, on a wet and lonesome road, having no recourse except to burst into tears and wait for death.”
“Americans are much more American than they are Northerners, Southerners, Westerners, or Easterners. And descendants of English, Irish, Italian, Jewish, German, Polish are essentially American. This is not patriotic whoop-de-do; it is carefully observed fact. … It is astonishing that this has happened in less than two hundred years and most of it in the last fifty. The American identity is an exact and provable thing.”
Rating: 6/10
Book Review: Sons and Lovers (Lawrence)
Have I read this before: No.
Review: Can a novel include a normal, healthy relationship or is that too boring? Of course, this is the guy who wrote Lady Chatterley’s Lover, so. Paul’s relationship with his mother is the most co-dependent relationship I’ve read about in a long time. I should shut up because I’m super close to my mom too, but not in the oddly terrifying way he is. It’s a pretty sad book if you think about it.
Favorite Part: Pauls’ thoughts on his lover Clara:
“’What is she, after all?’ he said to himself. ‘Here’s the seacoast morning, big and permanent and beautiful; there is she, fretting, always unsatisfied, and temporary as a bubble of foam. What does she mean to me, after all? She represents something, like a bubble of foam represents the sea. But what is she? It’s not her I care for.’”
Rating: 5/10
Best Books: 2022 Edition
I read 29 books last year! Now it’s time to pick the top five. From fifth best to best.
#5: The Grapes of Wrath (Steinbeck)
I still stand by my claim that if one wishes to read Steinbeck, one should not start with The Grapes of Wrath (especially if you’re young and/or have a short attention span). It is sloooooooooow at the start. But once things start to pick up and everyone gets on the move, the pacing gets a lot better and it’s much easier to get invested in the characters. Also, the ending is heartbreaking.
#4: The World According to Garp (Irving)
This is not as good as A Prayer for Owen Meany (because that book’s climax is the most perfect climax I’ve ever read), but it displays Irving’s wonderful ability of creating characters that are simultaneously boring and quirky and his ability of making you care about said characters even before you realize you do.
#3: A Confederacy of Dunces (Toole)
This was probably the weirdest book I’ve read on my list. I feel like Ignatius is what Boomers think all Millennials are like (even though this was written in 1980, before the first Millennials were even born). Ignatius is obnoxious but oddly charming in a weird way, and reading about his thoughts, adventures, and how he interacts with others was entertaining.
#2: Breakfast of Champions (Vonnegut)
Vonnegut has such a specific style and sense of humor, and of all the works of his that I’ve read so far, I think both the style and humor come out best in this book. It’s also full of little illustrations drawn by Vonnegut and the whole thing has a wonderful rhythm to it as you watch Hoover go more and more insane.
#1: Lonesome Dove (McMurtry)
I mean, was there any doubt? I loved this book, yo. I think Captain Call might be one of my favorite literary characters now, haha. This is another one that starts out slowly, but I honestly didn’t notice it that much because I was immediately engaged with the characters. Check it out if you’ve never read it; you won’t be disappointed.
OH LAWD, SHE WALKIN’
(Sorry.)
Guess what time of the year it is?
If you guessed Easter, you’re an IDIOT!
If you guessed “the start of the year, which means Claudia’s going to inundate us with a bunch of walking stats that no one cares about,” you’re RIGHT!
LET’S GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Here are my walking stats for January 1, 2022 to December 31, 2022.
Total number of walks: 365
Total mileage: 5,555.55
Total number of steps: 11,912,482
Total calories burned: 418,221
Total walking time (minutes): 80,253.19 [that’s about 55.73 days]
Average speed (mph) per walk: 3.72
5,555.55 miles is approximately the great circle distance between Fresno, California and Paris, France or between Toronto, Canada and Buenos Aires, Argentina.
Also, this is a new mileage record. Let’s demolish it next year!
Music: 2022 Edition
2021 was an aberration. There were not a lot of top tier songs and no 5 Stars. This year, while there still aren’t any new 5 Stars, there are many more good songs. So picking my top five is going to be a bit harder. But let’s do it anyway!
(Cue me going through the 2022 list and going “oh GOD” when I find a song that I love but forgot came from this year)
Euphoria by Muse
I love Muse, fight me. Bellamy’s vocal range is, as always, impressive. I still think this would be a great Rock Band song.
Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths
This song found me after a very stressful semester (or, rather, a very stressful like two years) and it triggered a very cathartic hour of ugly crying. This thing speaks to me on a molecular level. And as I mentioned when I first blogged about it earlier this year, it’s RIGHT in my vocal range, so I love to sing it.
No Time for Caution by Hans Zimmer
I can’t, bro. The buildup to 2:37 is so stressful. Zimmer is so good at buildups. The first time I listened to this song (apart from, you know, watching the movie) I had my cheapo $5 headphones on and I still got the crotch tinglies.
Living On Video by Pakito
Chorus is a killer. This is a very classic “Claudia-sounding” song.
Rats by Ghost
This actually IS a Rock Band song, haha. I don’t know what specific sub-genre of metal Ghost is, but whatever it is it’s the kind I like. This is another one where the chorus is fantastic, and the “they’re still comin’ after you” part near the end adds another layer to it.
WOO!
GLOBULAR
I like this kind of stuff, fight me.
Also, in my 2017 NaNoWriMo, I had a mapmaker who was still making globes when it had been confirmed that the earth was lens-shaped rather than round (it was a dumb story, haha).
Book Review: The Razor’s Edge (Maugham)
Have I read this before: Nope.
Review: I enjoyed this one! I like how Larry is introduced via interactions with several different friends, including Maugham himself. I think this paints a very realistic picture of how a person can be affected by war once said war is over. The other characters were enjoyable as well; you feel sympathy for Gray after the stock market crash, you feel frustrated at Isabel’s treatment of Sophie, and you feel sorry for Elliott both due to his own wants and just in general.
Favorite Part: The opening of Part Six:
“I feel it right to warn the reader that he can very well skip this chapter without losing the thread of such story as I have to tell, since for the most part it is nothing more than the account of a conversation that I had with Larry. I should add, however, that except for this conversation I should perhaps not have thought it worthwhile to write this book.”
Rating: 6/10
We Do This Every Year!
As I’m sure you all remember, December 27th is the day of the New Year’s Resolutions. So let’s check out last year’s and make some new ones, eh?
A review of the 2022 resolutions:
- ACCOMPLISHED: The blogs. They’re still being written daily, but they’re currently sitting in a 236-page Word document instead of being posted on WordPress. Because I’m lazy as all hell.
- ACCOMPLISHED: Walk at least…let’s do 5,000, why not. You’ll get a more in-depth review of this on January 1st, but it has been accomplished!
- ACCOMPLISHED: Run three times weekly whenever possible. Yup! I only missed this when absolutely necessary.
- FAILED: Complete a new draft of my 2020 NaNoWriMo. I worked on this a little bit, but I was way too busy to do a completely new draft this year.
- FAILED: Win NaNoWriMo 2022. Didn’t even do it this year. I’m a loser!
- FAILED: Run a marathon. I’m still not there yet. But I’m working on it!
- ACCOMPLISHED: Continue to get blogs in a physical format. It’s a slow slog, but it’s happening!
- FAILED: I MUST WORK OUT MY ARMS! APPARENTLY NOT!
Peh. Let’s see if we can do better in 2023 with the following:
- Blog daily. As always.
- Post all backlogged blogs. It’s getting out of hand, yo!
- Walk/run 5,000+ miles. This is becoming pretty standard, too.
- Run a marathon. The fact that I’m actually training for one is a good start, I think
- Complete another complete draft of my 2020 NaNoWriMo. This is, of course, a carry-over from this year. But I need to do it.
- Write more in general. I’m not saying I’ll do NaNoWriMo 2023 because who knows how busy the fall will be, but I should be writing more. That’s the only way you get better at it, after all.
- Draw. That’s it. That’s the resolution.
ONWARD!
Book Review: The Quiet American (Greene)
Have I read this before: No.
Review: Greene has an interesting writing style. I definitely liked this one better than The Power and the Glory. It held my attention better, even though I’m not a huge war novel fan. Perhaps it’s the characters and how Fowler expresses a very real range of opinions of Pyle depending on what’s going on around them and between them.
Favorite Part: Fowler’s and Pyle’s conversations when they were stuck in the guard tower and their eventual escape.
Rating: 5/10
Book Review: Oliver Twist (Dickens)
Have I read this before: I think I had started to read this back in like junior high but couldn’t get into it.
Review: Dickens is good at writing characters who are absolute fart bags but are also so intriguing that you want to see what happens to them (and hope that karma will get them in the end). Sikes is a good example of this. He’s also good at introducing characters and character relationships that are fleeting when first discussed but come up as major plot points (or the main plot point) later. I remember Great Expectations had a few instances of this; Oliver Twist does, too.
Favorite Part: Sikes getting his comeuppance. He bugged me.
Rating: 6/10
It’s “END OF THE YEAR SURVEY” time!
Let’s goooooooooooo
What did you do in 2022 that you’d never done before?
Applied for tenure renewal? SUPER EXCITING, I KNOW
Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
There will soon be a blog post regarding this!
Did anyone close to you give birth?
Nope.
Did anyone close to you die?
Not this year.
What countries did you visit?
I finally went back to the states! YAAAAAY
What would you like to have in 2023 that you lacked in 2022?
More certainty about my future, but I don’t think that will happen until 2024.
What date from 2022 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
I can’t think of a single date.
What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting better with running. Teaching ASHA.
What was your biggest failure?
Just being me.
Did you suffer illness or injury?
Nope.
What was the best thing you bought?
My new iPhone and AirPods!
Where did most of your money go?
To stuff I didn’t really need.
What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Going back to Moscow for the first time since 2019. I really, really, really missed going down there to hang out with my mom.
What song will always remind you of 2022?
“Achilles Come Down” by Gang of Youths.
What do you wish you’d done less of?
Procrastinated.
How will you be spending Christmas?
Christmas already happened for us!
Did you fall in love in 2022?
Nope.
How many one-night stands?
ZERO
What was your favourite TV program?
Still on Chicago Med.
Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Nope.
What was the best book you read?
I’m going to blog about this soon!
What was your greatest musical discovery?
There weren’t any huge ones this year, surprisingly. Though Muse’s “Euphoria” is fantastic.
What was your favourite film of this year?
Peh.
What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I didn’t do anything special. I turned 34.
What one thing would have made your year immeasurably satisfying?
Tenure! Haha. Again, 2024.
How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2022?
Loud. Colorful. Obnoxious.
What kept you sane?
Sanity is a GOVERNMENT CONSPIRACY
Which celebrity/public figure(s) did you fancy the most?
L E I B N I Z
Who did you miss?
My mom.
Who was the best new person you met?
Rob is pretty Coolio.
Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2022:
People are irresponsible, selfish, and dumb. OH WAIT I ALREADY KNEW THAT
Presents of Mind
Yo!
So we opened presents today because why the hell not? My family knows exactly what I like, haha. Observe:
A magnet from my mom. I’ve got it stuck to my treadmill where I can see it from my chair.
A FREAKING SCHERZER JERSEY from Nate. I’ve dubbed it my “Scherzey” and will wear it on opening day next season (it’s already covered in Pepper hair, haha).
I also got a cat calendar as always. WOO!
Book Review: Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass, an American Slave (Douglass)
Have I read this before: I think we read some excerpts of this in high school.
Review: I don’t think reading excerpts of this does the narrative justice, as you really do need the whole thing to see exactly how Douglass is shaped by his experiences, especially in terms of his desire to learn to read and write. I actually have no idea why we didn’t just read the whole thing; it’s not that long and it’s so much more impactful in its entirety.
Favorite Part: When Douglass beats the hell out of Covey. Cathartic.
Rating: 6/10
Book Review: A Moveable Feast (Hemingway)
Have I read this before: Nope.
Review: Want to experience the Lost Generation via Hemingway? Then read this and skip The Sun Also Rises. This is much more real and raw, obviously in part because it’s based on Hemingway’s actual interactions with other prominent individuals of the time. It’s a memoir, and it’s a good one. Also, the Kindle edition has a bunch of photographs and letters at the end, which is super cool.
Favorite Part: His description of F. Scott Fitzgerald:
“Scott was a man then who looked like a boy with a face between handsome and pretty. He had very fair wavy hair, a high forehead, excited and friendly eyes and a delicate long-lipped Irish mouth that, on a girl, would have been the mouth of beauty. His chin was well built and he had good ears and a handsome, almost beautiful, unmarked nose. This should not have added up to a pretty face, but that came from the coloring, the very fair hair and the mouth. The mouth worried you until you knew him and then it worried you more.”
Rating: 6/10
I AM MADE OF BUTTS
[insert survey joke here]
1. What are your plans for January?
Re-start my walking miles for the new year. Start marathon training. Teach. Not die in the cold.
2. What do you want to see happen in 2023?
I’d LOVE it if Covid just disappeared. Can you do it for me, 2023?
3. What would you give a 5 star rating?
Uhhhhhhhhh summer? It was nice to finally go back to Moscow for a bit and hang out with my mom there, even if the trip did get cut short a bit.
4. Do you have writing goals for 2023?
I do! I’m going to try to do at least one major edit/proofread of Ghost Town Realty.
5. How do you feel about memoirs?
That’s basically what this blog is, haha.
6. If you could join any musical group who would you choose?
COLDPLAY
7. What are your favorite genres across all media?
Can “classics” count as a genre? If not, documentaries. Though I don’t know how much documentaries reach beyond the medium of television.
8. What candle scents are your favorite?
NONE!
9. How well can you mimic other accents or voices?
I’m not too bad at this, actually. I can do the turrets from Portal pretty well. And the transit announcer from the start of Half Life. And Barney Rubble’s laugh. And Lois Griffin. And Comic Book Guy. And Ralf Wiggum. And probably others I can’t recall right now.
10. What books are on your TBR list in 2023?
Anything on this list that hasn’t been read yet!
11. When do you decide it’s time to upgrade/buy something new?
When it gets too worn out to function well enough for my needs.
12. Why is your favorite color your favorite color?
Because orange is simultaneously very soothing (at least to me) and something that makes you feel more energetic and happy.
13. Who understands you the best?
Probably my mom.
14. Do you write letters?
I genuinely can’t remember the last time I wrote a letter.
15. How do you keep going when times are hard?
I don’t.
Book Review: The House of Mirth (Wharton)
Have I read this before: No.
Review: Of the characters I’ve disliked in the books on this book list, I believe all of them so far have been dudes. But now we can break that pattern and throw Lily Bart on the “obnoxious as hell” list. Like, I get that that’s kind of the point of her and that she acts as a symbol of the flaws with social standing, moral corruption, etc. But ugh. She was hard to read about.
Favorite Part: With the above in mind, it was nice to see her experience the consequences of her actions over and over, at least until it all builds up and becomes too much for her. Then, of course, it’s sad.
Rating: 5/10
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