Category Archives: Work

Guys, can I spaz for a minute?

It totally hit me this afternoon.

I am teaching statistics.

Me.

I am freaking teaching statistics.

At a university.

I am responsible for the beginning statistical education of 137 college students.

The people in charge think I’m competent enough to teach my own section of statistics.

Teaching.

Teaching statistics.

Teaching statistics at a university.

Me.

Holy fslfjsgaahsdfjghlaweroaw.

I’m an educator!

Today I taught my first university class.

It was awesome.

I think it’ll take awhile for it to sink in that I’m actually independently responsible for a class of 130+ students. But I think it’s going to be the most fantastic time ever.

Oh, and I also had classes today!

  • I’m taking SAS Programming, which will end up being super helpful because it prepares us for the SAS certification exam, which would put us way ahead in the job market because pretty much every company that does analyses uses SAS and wants people who know how to use SAS.
  • And…CONCERT BAND! I haven’t played my clarinet in like three years, so the first few rehearsals will be interesting. BUT YAY MUSIC AGAIN FINALLY!

I’m done.

WISSJDFSLHGHDKSHR

I’m so totally in flail mode right now. Happy flail mode.

I have a grad student working for me (because there’s like 150 students in my section). That’s beyond creepy to me.

AND, while I was making the syllabus this afternoon, I realized that the grad student working for me is also the TA for the SAS programming class I’m taking. I have that class later in the day on Tuesday/Thursday after I lecture. That’s hilarious.

Edit: dude. I just realized…I GET TO TEACH THEM R.

Edit 2: my TA is the Joe Vandal twin that got jellyfish-mauled in Hawaii when we all went down there for the game.

[insert more flailing]

GUYS GUYS GUYS!

I just got a job as a lecturer for the U of I statistics department. I’ll be teaching the one Tuesday/Thursday section of STAT 251.

HOW FREAKING COOL IS THAT?!

This is what I’ve wanted to do for a long time now: teach statistics!

I’m beyond excited. I’m beyond nervous. It’s a class of 137 students. I have to create the syllabus/homework/exams, figure out how much material I can fit in 75-minute sections of time, practice so that my voice doesn’t waiver like a freak, and I’ve got exactly a week to do it all.

BUT STILL, HOW FREAKING COOL IS THAT?!

[deleted section of me mashing the keyboard in excitement]

 

Edit: aw, yeah.

Every time…

…I have to present stuff I’ve worked on in front of an audience, everything breaks down and doesn’t work.

Every. Time.

*frustration frustration frustration*

At least my spreadsheet thingy worked.

LOOK WHAT I MADE LOOK

Want to see my pretty? Or part of it?

This is the spreadsheet.

Here’s what it looks like when I select DAISY as the file type.

Here’s what it looks like when I select .epub as the file type.

Like two days ago, I had no idea you could do this in Excel. Excel has gained a whole new level of respect from me. Not that it cares.

(In my head, Excel is the most arrogant of the Microsoft Office products)

The obsessive part of me wants to now go back and fix the code for this so that it’s not six billion lines long.So that might have to happen soon.

Haha, sorry, I’m excited.

END!

Adventures in R: Decisions, Decisions, Decisions!

Hokay. So. Here’s the earth. Here’s what’s going down at work:

My boss put me in charge of writing up all these instructions for the ten or so AT programs that are used at Pima Community College. These programs make text/images/etc. on the computer accessible for students who need something to help them learn, be that need from a physical disability (low-vision, blindness, etc.), a learning disability, or some other such thing. These programs can do a lot of things: read text aloud on the computer, enhance displayed text so that it’s easier to read (magnification, color change, background color change, etc.), highlight individual words as their read…things like that.

Cool, huh?

It turns out, though, that of the twelve or so general features we utilize from these programs, each of the programs is able to different things. For example, a person using FS Reader will only able to change voice speed and magnify the screen, whereas a person using Kurzweil 1000 will pretty much be able to alter the visual and spoken text any way they wish.

The problem with this program diversity is that it makes it fairly difficult to help students choose which program is best for them—especially considering you have to keep track of ten different programs, some of which change with each software update.

So one of my tasks at work has been to make some sort of visualization that shows which programs have which features.

Which has turned out to be a more arduous task than first thought. Mainly because it’s difficult to include both the “reading features” (those related to the text-to-speech) and the “visualization features” (those related to how the text can be manipulated on screen).

The most “uncomplicated” visual I could do for the reading features was this pyramid thingy (even a regular flowchart looked horrible).

You don’t want to see the pictures for the visualization features. They’re horrible. There are twelve main features and no two programs have the same features. As you can probably guess, the pyramid looks like somebody vomited words everywhere and the flowchart looks…well, even worse.

My boss finally told me not to worry about a visualization for the features just yet, but I wanted to see if there was a way that I (with my lack of programming skills in everything but R) could make some sort of automatic “decision maker” that would spit out the appropriate program(s) if a user input what features they required.

So what did I, with my lack of programming skills in everything but R, use to do this?

R!

It took like four days, too. Either I’m a moron and over-thought this waaaay too much or it really is this complicated to implement in R.

Either way, here we go:

I wanted to make it so that someone wanting to figure out what AT program they needed could just input a binary YES/NO for each of the four reading options, copy this info in to R, and automatically get an output telling them what they could use. So I made this little Excel thing (click to enlarge, as always).

Next, I had to figure out a way to program my R function so that it would spit out the appropriate program for the given input (e.g., if I needed all four reading features, it would only show me Adobe Reader, EasyReader, Kurzweil and MAGic). This part wasn’t that big of a deal. But when I wanted to also make it possible for the function to spit out the appropriate program for ALL levels of customization (like if I wanted just voice speed to be editable, the function would give me ALL programs as options, not just FS Reader), things got a bit more difficult.

So I finally just made a code that included what to output for all possible combinations of the four reading features.

tellme <- function(x,print=TRUE) 
{ A=sum(x[,1])==1 
B=sum(x[,2])==1 
C=sum(x[,3])==1 
D=sum(x[,4])==1 
E=(sum(x[,1])==1)&&(sum(x[,2])==1) 
F=(sum(x[,1])==1)&&(sum(x[,3])==1) 
G=(sum(x[,1])==1)&&(sum(x[,4])==1) 
H=(sum(x[,2])==1)&&(sum(x[,3])==1) 
I=(sum(x[,2])==1)&&(sum(x[,4])==1) 
J=(sum(x[,1])==1)&&(sum(x[,2])==1)&&(sum(x[,3])==1) 
K=(sum(x[,1])==1)&&(sum(x[,2])==1)&&(sum(x[,4])==1) 
L=(sum(x[,1])==1)&&(sum(x[,3])==1)&&(sum(x[,4])==1) 
M=(sum(x[,2])==1)&&(sum(x[,3])==1)&&(sum(x[,4])==1) 
N=(sum(x[,1])==1)&&(sum(x[,2])==1)&&(sum(x[,3])==1)
&&(sum(x[,4])==1) 
O=(sum(x[,3])==1)&&(sum(x[,4])==1)
if (A==TRUE)            
{FSReader="YES"}     
 else if (A==FALSE)            
{FSReader="NO"}
if (A==TRUE|B==TRUE|E==TRUE)                 
{NaturalReader="YES"}            
else if (C==TRUE|D==TRUE|F==TRUE|G==TRUE|H==TRUE|                     
I==TRUE|J==TRUE|K==TRUE|L==TRUE|M==TRUE|N==TRUE)           
 {NaturalReader="NO"}
if (A==TRUE|B==TRUE|C==TRUE|E==TRUE|F==TRUE|H==TRUE)            
{WYNN="YES"}            
else if (D==TRUE|G==TRUE|I==TRUE|J==TRUE|K==TRUE|L==TRUE|
M==TRUE|N==TRUE)            
{WYNN="NO"}
if (A==TRUE|B==TRUE|C==TRUE|D==TRUE|E==TRUE|F==TRUE|
G==TRUE|H==TRUE|I==TRUE|J==TRUE|K==TRUE|L==TRUE|
M==TRUE|N==TRUE)            
{AdobeReader="YES"           
 EasyReader="YES"            
Kurzweil1000="YES"            
MAGic="YES"}            
else if (C==TRUE|D==TRUE|F==TRUE|G==TRUE|H==TRUE|I==TRUE|
J==TRUE|K==TRUE|L==TRUE|M==TRUE|N==TRUE)          
{AdobeReader="NO"            
EasyReader="NO"            
Kurzweil1000="NO"            
MAGic="NO"}
result <- rbind(FSReader, NaturalReader, WYNN, AdobeReader,
EasyReader, Kurzweil1000, MAGic)
return(result)
}

It’s still way too complicated for my taste; I was going to do it with the visualization features, but there are eight of those features and considering I had to do 16 different combinations just for the four reading features, I figured I’d hold off on the visualization features until I get a more streamlined code going for this project.

But check this noise:

Let’s say I was a student who needed to figure out what program(s) I could use based on my needs. I go to this little Excel check box thingy I made and select Voice Speed, Voice Profile, and Volume Control as the three things I need to be able to change.

I copy this info onto the clipboard and run the code in R. This is what it tells me:

FSReader      "NO" 
NaturalReader "NO" 
WYNN          "YES" 
AdobeReader   "YES" 
EasyReader    "YES" 
Kurzweil1000  "YES" 
MAGic         "YES"

Cool, huh?

What if I only needed to be able to change the Voice Profile?

FSReader      "NO" 
NaturalReader "YES" 
WYNN          "YES" 
AdobeReader   "YES" 
EasyReader    "YES" 
Kurzweil1000  "YES" 
MAGic         "YES"

Yay!

Next mission:  to make it better!

Claudia vs. The PDF of Doom: An Epic battle

Holy freaking Adobe goblins, I just spent nine hours trying to create a single PDF out of 34 textbook chapters.

NINE HOURS.

That’s FIVE HUNDRED AND FORTY MINUTES.

PDFs DO NOT WORK THAT WAY.

Yes, I admit the final document was going to be huge; 34 chapters do not lend themselves to a dinky complete textbook. But still…Adobe Pro (usually) makes it easy to merge a bunch of PDFs into one 743-page-long conglomeration, especially when said PDFs are 34 pre-tagged, page-numbered, ready-to-be-bookmarked chapters. It should not have taken me an average of 44 seconds per page here, people.

Haha, sorry. I seriously did just spend nine hours on something that should have taken me at most an hour, maybe an hour and a half. Needed to vent.

Plus there’s nothing of interest going on today. As usual.

Ooh, but I am gathering data for the big blog analyses that are coming for next Tuesday. Be prepared!

Working for the weekend? Not yet, but soon.

I have a job! Well, I WILL have a job in a few weeks (have to wait for the January Council of Counsilness to meet to get my approval). I need to start acquiring money ‘cause once I get my brain under control again, I totally want to go back to school.

It’s not a stats-related job, but it pays well, I can pretty much decide when during the day/week I want to work, and it will afford me the flexibility to take classes once the brain issues get resolved (which they BETTER) and I can concentrate.

And it’s a job that will directly help people, so that’s a good thing. I might also get the opportunity to learn Braille and/or ASL.

In the meantime, I must be frugal (even though I may have ~$3,000 in my Canadian account), try to remain relatively sane, and not have another day like Sunday.

Yeah. Right.

I need a job

Sometimes the best of all possible worlds really sucks.

Polar Expressions

I would wash dishes for the rest of my life if doing so would be my job down at McMurdo or the South Pole.

Jobs! Jobs for weird polar-obsessed people like me!

One of my ultimate goals is still to get down there. Maybe once I get my current “issues” fixed up to the point that they’re manageable I’ll apply to be a kitchen helper or a janitor or a housing assistant. Hell, I’d sort their garbage if that would get me down there.

I wonder if they need anyone to run some stats…?

Get a job!

Long, long ago (2005) in a galaxy far, far away (Seattle) I went and got professional aptitude testing done. It was super cool and involved a lot of different tests. One of these tests was the simple Holland Code or the Holland Occupational Theme. By answering a bunch of questions, the test gives you three of six letters, each corresponding to a personality type in the context of a working environment. The letters are A (artistic), I (investigative), R (realistic), C (conventional), and E (enterprising).

For whatever reason I was reminded of this test this afternoon. I don’t remember what my old results were, but I found an online version and took it again. Apparently my strengths lie in I, C, and A, in that order. With this code, my “recommended careers” include: archivist, statistician, anthropologist, desktop publisher, technical writer, or mathematician.

Here’s the link to the test I took. What’s your three-letter code and corresponding occupations?

New job review!

So either last night was a really easy night, or this job will consist of me sitting on a couch for 11 hours, reading.

I’m cool with that.

New job!

Wow…well, getting a job this summer was a LOT easier than it was last semester. Second place I went to and I got it.

Now I will work at Seubert’s the in-home care place right next to Subway. I start tonight, actually, and I’m working from 8 PM to 7 AM for a lady. I shall review for you tomorrow!

Road trip, University of Idaho-style

Haha.

So today was the day Team 4 of the University Housing Summer Crew got in the van and drove halfway up Moscow Mountain to clean a house the university owns up there because some big-wigs were coming into town and needed a conference place.

Let me tell you what happened there.

Alice decides that we should go up there after noon, so after lunch break like eleven of us get in the van (plus her and Roy, with the floor team following us) and we drive through town and up an old gravel road towards Moscow Mountain. I mention the gravel road because it’s important later.

After about a ten minute drive, we reach this HUGE house the university apparently owns about halfway up the mountain. Alice and Roy split us up into groups doing various jobs to make the house pretty before the conference that’s apparently going on tomorrow. I was alone, luckily, and I was in charge of watering all the plants around the house. Turn on the water spigot, nothing comes out. “Okay,” I think, “there’s no water on the outside of the house. That’s cool, I’ll just go fill up the watering can inside.”

Apparently there was no water anywhere in the entire house.

At this point I would like to mention that it hit about 97 degrees today.

So there we all are, stranded on a mountain in a house with no water, the floor crew completely lost as to how to do the floors, the rest of us just chilling as Alice and Roy have it out with each other over the whole water situation. Eventually, somebody gets the sink in one of the bathrooms to start trickling water at an alarmingly low rate; we’re instructed to do what we can with about an eighth of a bucket of water each.

Once we were done, we were still stuck up there waiting for the floor crew to finish, so we all sat outside on the driveway in the shade of the garage, antagonizing wasps with sticks and pretending to be awesome until 3:50 rolled around and we got into the van to leave.

By this point we each of us had exhausted our bottles of water and were all really thirsty and hot. Because of this, we decided to ride home with the van windows open—which in hindsight, was a bad plan, since the gravel got kicked up and turned us all a beautiful dust color and made us even thirstier.

But we got back, we got Otter Pops, and I unfortunately live to work another day at the U of I.

Fun with Shag Carpets

You know what’s great?

Shag carpeting in college student housing. What freaking genius thought of that? “In these houses will live members of the messiest demographic aside from children (though some of them will have children and bring them with them). Let’s put carpeting that catches EVERY LITTLE THING in EVERY SINGLE ROOM! BRILLIANT!”

Morons.

On the upside, I discovered $3.27 in change in one apartment today. I also vacuumed up what looked like five years’ worth of shedding from a large dog.

Protected: The Curse of the Fluorescent Light Fixtures: A True Story

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Police raids are fun, but the van is getting old

Well, work was interesting (for a change) today. We were cleaning this end apartment in one of the buildings on South Hill Terrace after lunch. I was vacuuming upstairs and I had to go empty the little vacuum bag. There’s this dumpster right outside the building we were in, so I go outside and empty the bag in there. As I’m out there, these five police cars drive up and park right in front of the building (their sirens weren’t on or anything, but they pulled in there like they were in a hurry).

One of the policemen walks up to me and goes, “do you know your neighbor?” pointing to the apartment next to the one we were in. I’m like, “hey, man, I just work for the university as a custodian,” so he leaves me alone and I go back into our apartment. We just keep cleaning for about fifteen minutes. Then one of the policemen comes in and tells us that we’re going to have to leave “for our safety.”

Yeah.

So we go sit in the van for the rest of the day.

My guess is that it had something to do with drugs, what do you guys think?

Follow-up to yesterday

So this working alone thing?

AWESOME.

I can listen to as much music as I want and sing along with it, I can dance, I can clean in whatever order I want, and I can do things MY way.

I love this. This makes this job so much better.

This Just In: The U of I Actually Helped Me Find Meaning in My Life (But Not Really)

Yay, my anosmia has a use!

Today we were driving around South Hill Terrace (for who knows what reason—god knows we weren’t cleaning) and Roy and Alice start to talk about this apartment that apparently hasn’t been cleaned in over two years because of a horrible stench inside of it that nobody can stand long enough to get the stench out.

We drive up to the apartment and we all get out to check out the stinky place. We all go in and within two minutes everybody else has a headache from the smell and has to leave. I’m standing in there going “this isn’t a problem at all!”

So Alice decides that if I don’t mind, I can work alone to clean the apartment until the smell is gotten rid of. This apartment, by the way, is pretty damn gross—the carpet is all covered in dirt and leaves, the oven is completely covered in who knows what (both inside and outside), there are cobwebs in the sink and cabinets and on the railing, the light coverings are all yellow, there are dead moths, bees, ants, spiders, and other miscellaneous bugs everywhere.

But I will be happy to work alone. It will get me out of the terrible drudgery of working with the guy who thinks he’s god’s gift to the world just because he can clean a toilet.

Protected: Wow, this place is inefficient

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Protected: Work is an interesting thing

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Random crap

Hahaha, my supervisor’s hilarious. There are three of us under her supervision, me and two guys. Today we started in a new apartment and she was assigning us to different places to start cleaning. She told me that I would be cleaning the cabinets and the oven hood, and one of the guys (he’s worked there awhile and knows her well, so he was obviously just messing around) goes, “isn’t that reinforcing the female stereotype that they belong in the kitchen?” Without missing a beat she goes, “women belong in the kitchen…” and then handed him a toilet brush “…men belong in the toilet.” It was the perfect comeback with the perfect timing. We all laughed for like an hour.

Oh, and here’s something else that made me laugh. I was updating my Facebook today and noticed that, in my “favorite music” list, Dethklok fit alphabetically between Deep Forest and Enya. Dethklok is metal. Deep Forest and Enya are about as new age as you can get.

That’s hilarious.

I FINALLY have a job for the summer

Good captain Christ, I’m working at the University of Idaho.

And guess what? It sucks. Why? Because it’s the U of I.

This is what I do:
-wash doors
-wash/scrub oven hoods
-wash cabinets
-sit in the van
-do absolutely nothing because they can’t find the keys to the next apartment we’re supposed to clean

Yup. Exactly as I expected.

At least I finally got a damn job.

“My Spidey Sense is jingling.” Wait, what? Oh yeah, I tied a bell to it.

Guess who’s done with WORK?!

Me.  

I’m a happy camper. So for the summer I raked in about $1,000, which is very nice. That’ll buy me books for two whole semesters, I bet!

Now I can go back to doing what I do best: dinking around.