Tag Archives: superman

In this blog: I attempt to sell a ShamWow to Superman

Via omegle.com.


Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Do you own a ShamWow?
Stranger: nope
You: You need one
You: They’ll cure all your ailments
Stranger: really i’m superman
You: You can stop a train, but can you stop a ShamWow?
You: It holds 50,000 times its own weight in crime!

[like five minutes pass]

You: …Superman?
Stranger: yeah
You: Are you on the phone buying a ShamWow?
You: Or I guess you could just run to the factory
You: It’d take like two seconds, right?
Stranger: u r wrong
Stranger: it just needs one second
You: Wow, very fast
You: You could use a ShamWow to clean your shoes after you run so far
You: Or do you fly? I forget
Stranger: of course i fly
You: Then you could use ShamWow as a supplementary cape
Stranger: come on buddy
Stranger: i don’t think i need that stuff
You: EVERYBODY needs a ShamWow!
You: Superheroes need to keep their kitchens super clean!
Stranger: do Superheroes need kitchen?
You: I don’t know if you need one, but do you have one?
Stranger: i prefer fast food
You: And Krypto the Wonder Dog, he needs to be dried after he’s out in the rain
You: It’s made in Germany
You: Krypton-free
Stranger: man u r incrediable!!!
You: Batman’s got a ShamWow, Wonder Woman’s got a ShamWow…jump on the bandwagon, S-man!
Stranger: wow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
You: See that? That’s exactly what you’re going to be saying every time!
You: But wait! Act now and we’ll throw in a second ShamWow ABSOLUTELY FREE for Clark Kent!
You: You got that ShamWow yet, Superman?
You: We’re counting on you!
Stranger: sorry for that, i have to go back to Mars. and thx for nice ads
You: Hahaha, no problem
You: Don’t forget a Slap Chop!
Stranger: yeah i won’t
Stranger: take care and wish u luck
You: Thanks, Superman!
Your conversational partner has disconnected