# Take a Gauss

Every mathematician needs a site like this.

Favorites:

• Gauss didn’t discover the normal distribution, nature conformed to his will.
• Gauss can recite all of pi – backwards.
• Gauss doesn’t understand stochastic processes because he can predict random numbers.
• Gauss is an exclusive member of an empty set.
• Gauss can calculate the determinant of a non-square matrix
• When Gauss was thirsty, he used Banach–Tarski paradox to get more orange juice.

# Said the statistician with the small sample size to the statistician with the large one: “I’m ‘n’-vious!”

POP QUIZ GO: What Englishman was it that Anders Hall called “a genius who almost single-handedly created the foundations for modern statistical science”?

It’s the same guy who Richard Dawkins labeled “the greatest biologist since Darwin.”

Give up? It’s SIR RONALD FISHER!

An evolutionary biologist, geneticist, and statistician, Fisher lived from 1890 to 1962. He had plans to enter the British Army upon his graduation from the University of Cambridge (where he studied biology/eugenics) in 1912, but he had horrible eyesight and failed the vision test. So what did he do instead? He worked as a statistician for London, among other things. He also started to write for the Eugenic Review, which only increased his interest in stat methods.

In 1918, his paper The Correlation Between Relatives on the Supposition of Mendelian Inheritance was published in which he introduced the method of analysis of variance (yup, ANOVA!). A year later, after taking a job with an agricultural station, he began to gather numerous sets of data—both large and small—which allowed him to develop methods of experimental design as well as small sample statistics. Throughout his professional career, he continued to develop ANOVA, promoted ML estimation, described the z-distribution (now used in the form of the F-distribution), and pretty much set up the foundation for the field of population genetics. He also (and I didn’t know this until I read more about him) opposed Bayesian statistics quite vehemently.

Anyway. Thought he deserved a bit of a mention today, since he died on this day in 1962.

# Fail me not, WordPress, and let me post!

This was always one of my favorite theories of personality for some reason.

Hahaha, I’m so pathetically not assertive.

Also this:

Short blog is short.

# HOT DAMN, Tukey Sandwiches!

No, that is not a misspelling.

NNNNH I have such a freakish urge to cook.
Hence these.

They’re a tribute to John Tukey, American statistician and source of horrible, horrible lunch meat puns. Yeah, I know, I made the joke two days ago and I haven’t been able to go 15 minutes without thinking, “exactly what would a Tukey sandwich entail?”
Ingredients, process, and general apology to Mr. Tukey as follows (I didn’t really measure stuff as I made this, so fair warning).

You will need:

• Bread. A small loaf works perfectly. You’ll need six pieces.
• Butter. About a tablespoon will work fine.
• Cheese. Colby Jack is preferred. Make sure it’s in a block so you can slice it.
• Turkey. Clean pieces of breast meat are best/neatest.
• Bacon. Three long slices will suffice.
• Mayo. 2-3 tablespoons.
• Cinnamon. A teaspoon sounds about right.
• Corn bread (or muffin) dry mix. Three or four tablespoons will be fine.
• Oil. Just a bit, maybe a teaspoon.
• Mrs. Dash.
• Water.

What you need to do to make this awesomeness happen:

1. Cut the crust off the six pieces of bread so that you have nice little squares.

2. Take three of said squares and coat one side of each lightly in butter.

3. Take the other three slices and toast them lightly, just enough to get them a little brown and provide them with a bit of structural integrity.

4. Mix the teaspoon of cinnamon with the mayonnaise. Add more cinnamon if you’d like. Mine looked pinkish when I was done. Once the three toasting pieces are done toasting, spread the mayo/cinnamon mix on one side of each of the three slices and set aside.

5. Place the buttered slices butter-side down onto a frying pan and turn on to low heat. Cut a three medium-thin slices of Colby Jack cheese and put a square onto each piece of bread as they heat up (note: they have up here in Canada land these cute little rectangular cuboids of cheese. They’re smaller in area than the bread, but I think it works fine that way).  Sprinkle the cheese and bread with Mrs. Dash and let it cook until the underside of the bread is golden brown and/or the cheese is gooey.

6. Cook bacon (I’m lazy, so mine was precooked and all I did was heat it up in the microwave). Tear the strips in half and position them in an “X” position on the mayo/cinnamon bread.

7. Now it gets fun. Take the corn bread dry mix and mix it with the teaspoon of oil and some water. I really didn’t measure this, but you’ll want a consistency similar to that of the mayo/cinnamon. Don’t make it too moist, but don’t make it dry enough to crumble.

8. Lay out the turkey meat and spread it with the corn meal mix. It looks gross, I know, but it tastes good.

9. Fold the turkey into nice little square packets and place each packet onto the bacon and mayo/cinnamon bread.

10. Complete the sandwich by putting the cheese/Mrs. Dash bread on top of the turkey and securing with a pretty frill. In my opinion, these taste equally good hot and cool, so if you made a super mess out of your kitchen like I did, go ahead and clean before you try them.

Voila!

So why does this qualify as a tribute to Mr. Tukey again?
– There are six pieces of bread because he came up with the Six Pack Test.
– The sandwiches are square because he came up with the boxplot.
– They’re small because he coined the word “bit.”
– They’ve got turkey in them because DUH.
– Cinnamon is brown. He went to Brown University. I’m funny.
– He was born in Massachusetts. Corn muffins are the state’s official muffin.
– The turkey is also Massachusetts’ state bird, which is hilarious.
– He made significant contributions to jackknife estimation, hence Colby Jack cheese. It’s a stretch, but so is this entire thing.
– And I just assumed he liked bacon.

So yeah. This is why I should not be allowed to have free time.