Remember those tests that I took yesterday? Here are some (funny and accurate) jokes about my types:

A FIVE’s answer to the “is the glass half-empty or half-full?” question: “Well, after measuring it precisely with my Fleuromaton instrument, I have concluded that the volume of dihydrogen oxide in this silicon-based vessel is 50.8%, thus qualifying it as roughly Half-Full.

An INTJ’s answer to the “is the glass half-empty or half full?” question: “How can you say it’s half-full? It’s half-empty! I refuse to listen to your reasoning!”

An INTJ’s dark side: All facts which don’t fit their theories are just wrong. The more all-encompassing and less applicable to reality the theories, the better.

The INTJ acronym: It’s Not Thoroughly Justified!

And finally, the top 10 signs you’re a FIVE (#1 is freakishly accurate for me):
10. You call your plants by their Latin names.
9. The more excited people around you get, the more drained you feel.
8. You spend your time at a party reading the books in the host’s library.
7. You communicate almost exclusively by e-mail.
6. Most of your friends are on e-mail, and you haven’t met any of them face to face.
5. You consider it a good vacation if you can stay at home with your computer, books, videos, and garden for a week.
4. You would like to do #5 for a living.
3. You’ve actually read Darwin’s “Origin of the Species” and think it would make an interesting movie.
2. Someone asks you how you feel about someone or something, and you tell them you’ll get back to them next week after you’ve had time to think about it.
1. You bite into a Snickers bar, and you immediately see the correlation between the dissolving chocolate/peanut mixture with quantum electrodynamics and the potential existance of dark matter in the universe, the association of Mozart’s unfinished symphony and the cryptographic origins of ancient Sumerian linguistics, and how the right handed Cartesian orthoganal system of coordinates aligns with Mitochondrial cellular respiration, giving you a new understanding of the role of derivatives in modern financial portfolio analysis, and the enneagrammatic functions inherent in Microsoft’s Windows 98. AND when you try to explain this simple relationship, people have no clue what the HELL you’re talking about.

So today I took a couple online temperament/personality type test thingies. The first one I took was an online version of the Keirsey Temperament Sorter, which is a test I’ve already taken (and was classified as an INTJ). According to the online test, I am still an INTJ (introverted, intuitive, thinker, judger), or a Mastermind. I seem to very much match the description:

“They are rather rare, comprising no more than, say, one percent of the population. Being very judicious, decisions come naturally to them; indeed, they can hardly rest until they have things settled, decided, and set. They are the people who are able to formulate coherent and comprehensive contingency plans, hence contingency organizers or “entailers.” Masterminds will adopt ideas only if they are useful, which is to say if they work efficiently toward accomplishing the Mastermind’s well-defined goals. Natural leaders, Masterminds are not at all eager to take command of projects or groups, preferring to stay in the background until others demonstrate their inability to lead. Once in charge, however, Masterminds are the supreme pragmatists, seeing reality as a crucible for refining their strategies for goal-directed action. In a sense, Masterminds approach reality as they would a giant chess board, always seeking strategies that have a high payoff, and always devising contingency plans in case of error or adversity. To the Mastermind, organizational structure and operational procedures are never arbitrary, never set in concrete, but are quite malleable and can be changed, improved, streamlined. In their drive for efficient action, Masterminds are the most open-minded of all the types. No idea is too far-fetched to be entertained-if it is useful. Masterminds are natural brainstormers, always open to new concepts and, in fact, aggressively seeking them. They are also alert to the consequences of applying new ideas or positions. Theories which cannot be made to work are quickly discarded by the Masterminds. On the other hand, Masterminds can be quite ruthless in implementing effective ideas, seldom counting personal cost in terms of time and energy.”
Several Masterminds include Isaac Newton, Stephen Hawking, President Ulysses S. Grant, Friedrich Nietzsche, Thomas Jefferson, Augustus Caesar, and Ayn Rand.

Then I took another couple of tests to find out my Enneagram type. I’m a FIVE (the thinker/investigator):

“People of this personality type essentially fear that they don’t have enough inner strength to face life, so they tend to withdraw, to retreat into the safety and security of the mind where they can mentally prepare for their emergence into the world. Fives feel comfortable and at home in the realm of thought. They are generally intelligent, well read and thoughtful and they frequently become experts in the areas that capture their interest. While they are sometimes scientifically oriented, especially with the Six wing, just as many Fives are drawn to the humanities and it is not at all uncommon for Fives to have artistic inclinations. Fives are often a bit eccentric; they feel little need to alter their beliefs to accommodate majority opinion, and they refuse to compromise their freedom to think just as they please. The problem for Fives is that while they are comfortable in the realm of thought, they are frequently a good deal less comfortable when it comes to dealing with their emotions, the demands of a relationship, or the need to find a place for themselves in the world. Fives tend to be shy, nonintrusive, independent and reluctant to ask for the help that others might well be happy to extend to them.”

Several Fives include Albert Einstein, Stephen Hawking (again), Stanley Kubrick, Friedrich Nietzsche (again), and Vincent Van Gogh.

So yeah. I’m pretty much these.

Don’t mess with the MASTERMIND FIVE!!