I’m sorry. I love these.
yalborap: So there’re these ‘don’t start forest fires’ commercials telling me to get my smokey on. And all I can think is “If an anthromorphic bear in a pair of jeans and one of those ranger hats comes up and tells me not to set stuff on fire, I probably already did”.
XenThra: I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I’m terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
DevXen: Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Wind-X: and penis butter and jelly make a good sandwich
Bobby20: I had this really weird dream once that I dropped my penis in the shower and I couldn’t get it to go back on
`BuM: why is it that, no matter how much you pee into the toilet it never fills up?
!Lun_e: ill just sit here and eat my Kice Rispy Paralellogram.
concubine: NO CAPSLOCK! I AM UKRAINE
smcn: one of these days
smcn: i’m going to hunt down and kill whoever invented emoticons
smcn: then i’m going to look at him and go :=D
polaris: haha… mozilla rocks… I accidently clicked on horse pron on stileproject and it crashed before displaying it
Kacey: if I wsa president, I would change the “In God We Trust” to “In Goats We Thrust”
(DigDug) i’m really glad that my penis doesn’t have an odometer
Mass: hey does anyone know what the song name is by Frankie Lymon that goes Uhhh uhh uh uh uhahhhhh uhh uhh uh
orion`-`-: what the fuck
orion`-`-: i think the icecream truck just hit a kid
hypr: MY MOM WONT LET M,E WEAR HEADPHONES CAUSE SHE THINKS THEY WILL GIVE ME CANCER OR A BRAIN TUMOR
hypr: she like sneaks up behind me and takes them off and says she will break them if she sees em on me again
[cut]: schwtzngr: IT’S NOT A TUMOR! (this is super funny if you’ve seen the Arnold clip).
Inoshiro: “Don’t iron, don’t put in a triangle, don’t put in an oval”
Inoshiro: Is there a translation table for the washing tag on clothing?
DigiGnome: Real life should have a fucking search function, or something.
DigiGnome: I need my socks.
goltrpoat: ‘britney spears’ is an anagram for ‘presbyterians.’
Sharkey: The rain in spain falls mainly on the spaniards.
]km[cugar: i tried to make hammer pants out of garbage bags
gaspumpXP: Man… what kind of RPG is this? It won’t let me rape the sheep…