Haha, I really like this website. Some of these are hilarious. Observe:
pigeon-mirk: davey made that avatar for me, i am eternally in his bed
+kritical: christin: you need to learn how to figure out stuff yourself..
+Christin1: how do i do that
@codstar: rice crispies and hangovers don’t go together
@codstar: first time ive ever told a bowl of cereal to stfu
BoZmAn20: Goddamnit, my ex girlfriend has such horrible taste in men
Dogan: GUYS, STORY TIME
Dogan: SO my teacher’s friend’s friend or something
Dogan: She was dogsitting one day
Dogan: Shows up the first time, finds the dog dead on the floor, right?
Nightryde: how embarrassing
Dogan: SO she’s gotta pack the dog corpse up and take it to the vet so they can dispose of it or whatever
Dogan: She can’t find anything to fit it in, so she stuffs it in a freaking SUITCASE
Dogan: She didn’t have a car so she has to take the train through Chicago
Zeelot: oh mannnn
Dogan: This guy helps her carry the case on and is like
Dogan: “this is pretty heavy, what’s in it?”
Dogan: lady replies “just some computer things”
Dogan: the guy SOCKS HER IN THE FACE AND RUNS OFF WITH THE CASE
joebot: ROFLMAO ROFLROFLROFL!!!
Zeelot: OMG ROOOOOOOOOFL
Nightryde: AHAHAHAHAHAHA HOW would you pawn that sort of thing???
spacecat: i dont rly like virgin airlines
spacecat: i mean whats the point in going on a plane that doesnt go all the fucking way
ZondrZout: Dammit, something is coming out of my ass!
LeoDV: Don’t fight for fuel, stroke your tool!
KANG: that’s the worst slogan anyone has ever had
LeoDV: Touch your sack, not Iraq!
KANG: I stand corrected.
LeoDV: War is heinous, thumb your anus!
LeoDV: http://www.masturbateforpeace.com/ This is where heroes go when they die
KANG: I hate you more than anything
@khmer: you guys heard of cole’s law?
DaDemon: lettuce and cabbage with mayo?
* @khmer sighs deeply
Potassium: diet cock tastes horrible
Poiesis: ladies and gentlemen, Sigmund Freud!
Kasyx_: has anyone ever noticed how the moment Randall isn’t idle any more, everyone attempts to seem more intelligent?
Sarevok: UNLIMITED DICKS
Kasyx_: well that backfired
ftr: When I was 13, I was so nervous and horny that if you just looked at me funny I would ejaculate the word ‘Sorry’
cujo: My penis is burning
XanT: Thats ALGEBRA.
jeebus: the “bishop” came to our church today
jeebus: he was a fucken impostor
jeebus: never once moved diagonally
studdud: what the fuck is wtf
Also: happy birthday to Sean!