What the man who discovered handheld black holes said: “I have the hole whorled in my hands!”
Hurrah for homecoming! I love seeing my old elementary school and high school. ‘Tis fun. Though I think I annoyed the crap out of the clarinet section by the end of the day, because every time I got a glimpse of the high school I was all, “holy crap there’s Moscow High School I went there and was in the band yay!!” Sorry, guys.
And I wish Idaho would have scored earlier in the game—I would’ve gotten hold of those little ribbon things they shoot from the boxes in the ceiling earlier and would have been decked out even dorkier than I was. What fun boredom + ribbons can be!
Yeah, boring blogs. Deal with it!
“So here is little-bitty song and dance from me, Vladimir Putin!”
Haha, oh my. A fair warning for all of you: unless you actually enjoy my loudness, my obnoxiousness, my stupid jokes, my never-ending laughing at my own stupid jokes, and my…well…let’s just call it my “naivety”, sit as far away from me as you possibly can if you must be on the same bus as me. Just letting you know.
So, today was a rather uneventful day…until the incident(s) with the vibrating phone(s) and the hour-long bus ride to Pullman.
Things we pondered included (most of this you missed, Matt—this is here for you!):
The existential crisis!
My new idea: a blank fortuneteller is an analogy to the human condition. More elaboration on this idea (what I shall call “The Fortune Theory”) in a later blog, once I get it all worked out. Promise.
What birthed Pullman
Yeah. I said something to the effect of, “I wonder what birthed Pullman?” And then came up with this whole idea of a Celestial Mother crapping out Pullman, peeing out Moscow, and various other things for Troy, Genesee, and Potlatch. This was extremely humorous about two hours ago.
How Troy (the Troy in Idaho) got its name
“There was this chick named Helen and the guys were all OMFG horse!”
Low Rider: The Musical
I couldn’t get the song Low Rider out of my head, so Jessie and I, of course, started singing it. I don’t quite know how I got to the point of the song becoming a musical, but I did, and now it shall be, and it will star Millard Fillmore and will include at least one scene from Titanic.
Fun times, fun times.
The ride to Boise will be fun, hehe…
Waiter! There’s four and twenty blackbirds in my pie chart! (Confused? Understandable.)
Today I learned that the short number 119 in our music is, in fact, Sexy Back. I think I frightened Torrey when I starting jumping around screaming, “holy crap, YES!” Plus, if we end up doing a half-time show to Village People music in the near future, it was totally my idea, for the record.
The game came close to being fun for me (“what?” you say. “A football game…fun?!”). I think it was because I was in close proximity to Matt, Beau, Maggie, and Rob. And the two weddings that occurred on the bus helped as well. Matt, if we frightened you, I apologize on behalf of all of us weirdos (Gate Control Theory! Ahahaha… ).
Yeah.
I was going to blog about something else, but I can’t remember what it was. Sad? Yes.
!MOOD fo eltiT golB sdrawkcaB ehT
Hooray! So volleyball games started tonight, and dangit, are they fun! I get to hang out with a bunch of cool people who don’t find me too obnoxious!
Also, we got all our shows on the field today, finally. They’re not too great, but they’re on the field. Now I just have to remember them so I can help my squad. What was I thinking, signing up to be a squad leader? I suck.
Ah, no matter. Why am I blogging about this? The two of you (yes, I’m convinced now that only two of you read these) are both in band and know of my rants/ravings/insane fun.
Oh well. Better blog tomorrow.
Why do I always say that?
Blog 480: In Which I Could List Every Possible Spelling of the City “Coeur d’Alene”
Ooh, major band fun tonight! A group of us trundled in a wonderful little bus up to Coeur ‘d Alene (I should have brought my video camera) and played for a bunch of U of I alumni up there. I’d say the best part was when we were waiting to perform and the gaggle of drunk people came up and starting conversing with Matt, Mike, Beau and I. What fun!
Can’t wait for Boise.
Oh-ho-ho! Somebody left the water running! I guess all we can do now is count the sunflowers
MARCHING BAND! WOOOOO!
Ah, it’s good to see fellow dorks again. I’ve been in isolation 95% of the summer (a few days with my Moscow friends and about a week in Boise with Matt were the only social interactions I had).
What else was I going to say?
Oh yeah. My dorm room RULES!
Band + sexual-based songs = fun
Huttah! He-brides! This is what my Tuesdays and Thursdays will consist of for about a month:
I. He-bride pirates shouting “scurvy!” and “arrrrrr!” and “throw me my sexin’ pants, me bucko!”
II. He-bride lovers running in slow motion towards each other because that’s what lovers do.
III. A completely non-sexual song about milking said he-brides.
IV. Something about the he-brides going to an isle. I’m still not quite sure about this one.
And so yeah. I love concert band.
They’re…they’re Cheetos™…they’re, they’re…they’re Cheetos™…
“In heaven there are no Cheetos™,
We won’t be able to eat those.
We’ll have to resort to Fritos™,
Our friends will have eaten all our Cheetos™!”
Sing to the melody of “The Beer Song”.
Only band geek clarinets (a.k.a. Maggie and myself) will truly understand the caliber of this song.
Sadness is no more marching band
Man, now I need to find a new outlet for my craziness, dorkiness, and insanity.
Also, now what am I supposed to blow??
The “Band Geek” test!
Ha-ha! I just found this great test online. I took it, and I got 48 points. Very accurate!
The Band/Marching Band Geek Test!
> You hear a whistle and immediately snap to attention: 1
> After practicing your instrument, you find it tough to type because of muscle memory in your fingers (especially relevant to three-valve instruments): 2
> After practicing, you find it tough to kiss properly (especially relevant to tuba, trombone, and baritone players): 3
> After practicing, you actually have a boyfriend/girlfriend to discover that it is difficult to kiss properly: -10 (you lie!)
> You have participated in a sung version of one or more of the song you play with the rest of the band members (singing your own sections part): 7
> You hear the phrase battle of the bands and immediately picture competing marching bands playing it out on the football field: 6
> You can march the distance of 5 yards perfectly in the span of 8 beats…
…backwards: 4
…backwards and with your eyes closed: 6
…backwards, with your eyes closed, and while carrying a tuba/sousaphone/baritone/saxophone: 10
> The name Sousa…
…gives you the chills: 1
…excites you: 4
> This one time at band camp is a phrase you’ve actually used and have not just quoted from American Pie: 8
> You’ve decked out your instrument with those battery-operated Christmas lights…
…for a holiday performance: 7
…on a regular day/performance: 10
Now add up your total…
< 4: The Jock
What the crap are you doing taking a Band Geek test? You obviously show little or no signs of being a Band Geek. Go back to being a Goth/jock/cheerleader or whatever you do–were busy practicing our scales!
5-14: The Greenhorn
Well, I suppose every young Band Geek has to start somewhere. My suggestion is to spend as much time as you can trying to perfect your geeky ways. Have you ever been to band camp?
15-24: The Average Joe
You fall into the average category. That is, you’re like the majority of those who consider themselves Band Geeks: not near elite, but not entirely mediocre, either. Keep marching, you’ll get there!
25-34: The Contender
You are quite Band Geeky, but you probably have other activities that interfere with your band schedule. Stay the course, and one day you may become one of the Elite Geeks!
35-44: The Artist
It is quite an accomplishment to become this geeky—congratulations! You seem to have the right amount of geekiness to succeed in band, but you also aren’t a total geek and therefore have some social skills! Congratulations!
> 45: The Elite Geek < (this is me!)
You, my friend, fall into the smallest yet most looked-up to categories of band geeks: the Elite Geek. You are the pure Band Geek in its most natural form. My guess is that you play more than one instrument and have never had a boyfriend/girlfriend. But that doesn’t really matter right now your current top priority is getting that solo!
Soreness, the “flood”, and the Band Awards Night
First point of discussion: I am very sore from bowling at the Senior Sneak. Sad? Yes. Depressing? Yes. A good excuse for not working on my physics tonight? Yes.
Second point of discussion: Our school is obviously not flood-proof. We had some form of five-minute torrential downpour at lunch today and one whole hallway of the school flooded. Plus, when I got to band, half the floor (which is carpet, mind you) was soaking wet. We all had to cram into half of the room, which was a challenge, considering it was mostly full of chairs.
Third point of discussion: The Band Awards were tonight at the Junior High (which luckily wasn’t flooded). These were the thingies I won:
– Future Conductor Award
– Band Geek Award
– Garrett’s (our teacher) Pet Award
– 6 Year Award (only 3 of us got it–in normal years there are like 6 or 7)
– Leadership and Inspiration Award (I had no idea I’d win this one…quite a shock)
We had pizza and it was fun.
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