Flight
Y’all, this was one of my favorite movies when I was a kid. It’s kind of got E.T. vibes, but is vastly superior because E.T. was horrifying and terrible. This is engaging and fun.
Anyone else remember this one?
Claudia’s Fake Radio Station from 1999
As I’ve mentioned on here multiple times, I was OBSESSED with my mom’s camcorder when I was a kid/pre-teen and was always making stupid videos, fake TV shows, and the like.
But before the camcorder came the tape recorder, and JESUS CHRIST it was the same sort of obsession. I remember having a tape player/recorder when I was really young (back when we lived in Troy, so like six or seven years old?) and it had this little microphone thingy attached by a spiral cord. I remember doing all sorts of interviews and other weird stuff with it.
Fast forward to the late ‘90s (1999 to be exact) and I had a fancier tape recorder but the same old desire to do weird-ass fake radio stuff with it. I recorded an entire tape of me doing commercials, interviews, news segments, and a decent amount of music I recorded from an old Monopoly game I had on CD.
Wanna hear it?
(Side 1 content starts around 0:17)
(Monopoly music on Side 2 stops around 4:27)
The “ZFAT 101” comes from the “Z-Fun 106.1” radio station in Moscow.
At least I’m not singing along with the Monopoly music. There’s a tape of me from fifth grade on which I distinctly remember singing about Rogaine to one of those songs on side 2.
Yes, there’s a commercial like every two minutes. It’s infinitely more entertaining than me going all improv on my electronic keyboard two-thirds of the way through side 1, though.
It’s shocking I didn’t go into journalism or mass media or film or something like that given all this nonsense I did as a kid.
(It’s actually not that shocking; I became much more introverted as I got older and also realized I was ugly and untalented and so had absolutely no chance of success in any of those fields.)
Another Simpsons Follow-Up
So last month I mentioned a few lines from The Simpsons that I think about fairly frequently, right?
Well, here are two from Futurama.
“Grunka, lunka, dunkity, darmed guards…”
“SHUT THE HELL UP!”
And:
“My only regret is…that I have…boneitis!”
A Simpsons Follow-Up
So remember a few days ago when I posted a Simpsons line that’s frequently in my head? Another one is from that episode where Apu stopped working at the Kwik-E-Mart and he and the Simpsons sang the “Who Needs the Kwik-E-Mart?” song and Homer screws up the rhyme.
“Apu: Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
Marge: Their floors are sticky-mart
Lisa: They made dad sicky-mart
Bart: Let’s hurl a bricky-mart
Homer: The Kwik-E-Mart is real – DOH!”
Homer’s line is another one that is in my head quite often.
Anyway.
What is one Simpsons line that you quote frequently in your head?
Here’s one of mine.
There are others, but this is one of the top ones.
That is all.
I am not a movie person
But these are two movies I’d love to see.
I found Lonesome Dove on YouTube and OMG
It’s incredibly true to the book, which means it’s great. The water moccasin scene was terrifying, just like it was in the book. I’m just to the point where Lorena gets captured by Blue Duck, but I’m excited to watch the rest of it.
WOO!
Riverdale, man
So Riverdale has, somehow, gotten even weirder.* They’re now in like some sort of alternate universe (?) town called Rivervale, which I thought would just be a one-episode thing but it’s been going on for a few episodes now. Rivervale Cheryl sacrificed Rivervale Archie, so he’s dead, but that’s not even the weirdest thing.
Like, let me describe this dream I had last night just to give you an idea of how weird things have gotten. In the dream, all the characters are fighting one another one-on-one. Jughead is fighting Reggie, and in the middle of this flaming metal arena, Jughead looks menacingly at Reggie and mutters, “say hello to Elizabeth for me.” And Reggie’s like, “who’s Elizabeth?” Then Jughead looks down at this raw chicken that’s just sitting on the ground, pulls a whip out of god knows where, and whips the raw chicken. This makes the chicken explode, launching Reggie across the arena and into the wall. And in answer to Reggie’s question, Jughead nods at the half-exploded raw chicken and says, “her.”
And when I woke up, I had to really think about whether that was all a dream or if that was actually part of the episode I’d watched yesterday.
It’s that weird now.
Edit: and now the LITERAL DEVIL is in Rivervale because PFFFFFT FUCK IT
Edit again from like six episodes later: WHAT IN THE HELLING HELL IS THIS SHOW ANYMORE
*Yes, I’m still watching Riverdale because I have trash taste. Deal.
DOESN’T LOOK LIKE THEY’LL REVIVE HER!
I’ve had this song stuck in my head all day, but with the lyrics replaced by the lyrics from “French Erotic Film.”
Tell me the internet was your best friend in high school without telling me the internet was your best friend in high school.
So RANDOM THOUGHT:
Gravity Falls. I’ve never watched it (apart from like little clips), but two things that bug me about it:
ONE: Why does Dipper sound like he’s 40 years old? Like, the two girls in the below clip sound appropriately aged. Why does Dipper sound like he’s about to take out a second mortgage on his condo?
TWO: Why doesn’t Bill Cipher sound like Plankton from Spongebob? He should sound like Plankton from Spongebob.
Am I judging a cartoon on very superficial components without ever watching it? Yes.
Fight me.
(This blog is brought to you by 1.5 hours of sleep and a REALLY weird bag of cheese.)
Collect n’ Display
My dad collects stuff.
He always has.
Christmas ornaments, VHS tapes, DVD sets, Happy Meal toys, you name it.
So it’s no surprise that when seasons of The Simpsons started to come out on DVD way back in *looks up release date of the first season and gets lost on Wikipedia for two hours* 2001, he started to collect them season by season. Then we got to Season 6 and the DVD box looked like this:
Yes, that is a 3D plastic Homer head. I think it had a super flimsy clear sleeve to make it more DVD-box-shaped, but I don’t remember what happened to that.
Anyway, I remember thinking that people might be upset at the sudden structural change to the DVD box. When I read the little insert inside that had a blurb from Matt Groening, he actually mentioned that they sold “regular” versions of the case (where it was just your traditional DVD box shape and material) for people who were “obsessive about that sort of thing” (not a direct quote, but it was something like that). Which is hilarious.
Anyway, here’s a whole video on the controversy surrounding this unique box.
Fun times.
French Erotic Film
Yesterday’s delve into old Flash animations that I enjoyed as a youth brought back the memory of the incredible “Colin Mochrie vs. Jesus H. Christ” trilogy.
If you have never seen this before, you are now commanded to watch it.
I can sing all those lyrics from memory. I have all three of these songs and anytime I hear them I sing those lyrics.
THE UGLY ONE!
I had the strangest desire to re-watch all of the Teen Girl Squad episodes today.
Y’all remember Teen Girl Squad? Y’all remember Homestar Runner in general? Good times.
Anyway, here’s a playlist of TGS on YouTube.
The second one is my favorite.
“You must be girls.”
*I think I have a chance with this guy!*
And the cloud eating the birds.
Ah, 80’s Movies
Does anyone else remember this movie?
I watched this with my dad a lot, haha. Billy Crystal + Danny DeVito is a great pair.
Also, Danny DeVito has been around FOREVER, hahaha.
Movie!
So Nate and I watched The Prince of Egypt tonight. I’d seen it many times before, but this was the first time he’d seen it. I hope he liked it, because I think it’s one of the most well-done animated movies out there. I like how it doesn’t shy away from showing the darker parts of the story; that’s what makes it so impactful.
The plagues scene terrified me as a kid, haha.
I love the way his dream is animated (about halfway through this clip). Again, not shying away from the darker parts.
And, of course, the stunning parting of the Red Sea:
Watch it if you haven’t before. It’s phenomenal.
Oooooooooooh noooooooooo
So for WHATEVER THE HELL REASON, the phrase “oh no, Mr. Bill” arose from the depths of my cavernous memory this afternoon and so I of course had to see if the old Claymation (and I use that word very loosely) sketches were anywhere to be found on YouTube.
And of course they were.
There’s more, too.
I think my dad had a VHS tape will all the Mr. Bill shorts from SNL on it. I have very vivid memories of watching repeated Mr. Bills on his old TV in the condo.
TOOOOOOOOOOOOOLS OUT! FOR! PLUMBERS!
I’m sorry, but this is one of the funniest things I’ve seen all year.
“That’s a dirty-ass baby, GO!”
I AM BORED AND SAD AND WHAT ELSE IS NEW
I don’t know if I’ve ever posted this on here before, but oh my god I needed some cheering up and this certainly helped tonight.
The “is this ASS-BESS-TOSS???” is great.
Castaways!
So remember a few weeks ago when I mentioned I was obsessed with The Backyardigans?
I’m still obsessed with The Backyardigans.
BUT I’ve also found a video discussing the “Castaways” song and how much effort was put into making it a bossa nova groove. It is SUPER interesting.
Now I’m going to have that song stuck in my head for days, haha.
Community Table Read
This is absolutely hilarious. Pedro Pascal fits in with them so perfectly and it’s fantastic how he can’t get through the sperm dialogue without laughing.
Muppets??
This actually looks like one of the old classic Muppet movies, yo.
Needs Rizzo, though.
SAY HELLO TO YOUR FRIENDS!
We had this on VHS. I loved the Baby-Sitters Club books when I was little.
SO 90’s, dude.
ALSO, this is one of those examples I mentioned a while back of something where I remember the intonation/rhythm of everyone’s dialogue (and I remember the music, of course) but I don’t remember exactly what they were saying. This is how a lot of my memories of early childhood movies/TV work. I can still anticipate every single change in intonation or rhythm because I remember that so well, but the actual words haven’t stuck.
Are anyone else’s memories like that?
Thanks, TikTok
Because everything has been so horrible the past few months, I’ve turned to TikTok as a source of “I don’t wanna deal with life so let me watch short videos instead” coping mechanism.
Don’t make fun of me. I need something.
Anyway, there’s this audio that’s been going around on TikTok called “Into The Thick Of It!” I had no idea where it came from but it sounded intriguing, so I looked it up. Turns out it’s from an episode of a kid’s show called “The Backyardigans.”
The Backyardigans ran from 2004 to 2013, a timeframe that definitely missed my childhood years. So I don’t remember the show, but apparently it’s known for its songs and music. All of its episodes are on YouTube, so I decided to check out a few.
Now I’m addicted, haha. It’s lighthearted and adorable, which is really what I need right now. Also, the music and songs ARE really good. Austin (the kangaroo) has the cutest freaking voice.
So if you need a chill kid’s show for whatever reason, give it a watch!
Conservatives are getting triggered by a Muppet and I’m living for it
Specifically, the BEST Muppet: Gonzo the Great.
So apparently there was a recently-aired Muppet Babies episode in which Gonzo wore a dress and called himself Gonzorella.
And the degree to which this is pissing off conservatives is HILARIOUS.
Oh No He WoRe A dReSs WhAt KiNd Of HoRrIbLe MeSsAgE dOeS tHiS sEnD
Hilarious but also sad, of course. What kind of delusional, backwards world must you live in to think that this is the biggest “threat” to children instead of, I dunno, the bi-weekly school shootings that we all get to hear about?
Fucking ridiculous.
Also, let’s be real. If there’s a canonically gender-nonconforming Muppet, we all know it’s Gonzo.
Eigenblogger 