Claudia vs. Emojis


Okay, I know I did a blog post on emojis not too long ago, but holy hell. Now I have a smart phone and I can see the insanity firsthand.

I mean, I get it. Some of these are actually useful and/or sensible. Like the regular smileys. I use regular smileys over Skype and Facebook and whatnot to indicate sarcasm, mood, good-natured jesting, whatever.

But then it gets weird.

 

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It’s an eye. One eye. It’s not even a “generic cartoon round shape” eye. It’s shaped kind of like a normal eye. But there’s just one. Why?

 

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I DON’T UNDERSTAND THE POOP WHY IS THE POOP A THING

 

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A pager, a fax machine, a floppy disk, and a VHS tape. ‘Cause LOL 90’s, right?

 

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I don’t even know what this is. What the hell is this?

 

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Yup. Them’s shapes.

 

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I think this last page is Android saying, “we don’t know what the hell category to put this stuff in, so here are drugs, a gun, an Easter Island head, and a toxic barrel, you goddamn Millennials.”

 

WHY DO YOU NEED ANY OF THESE IN PICTURE FORM. Why would I ever want to text message someone the high density polyethylene plastic recycling symbol? Why would I ever want to text someone die faces? Or chess pieces?

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Or whatever the hell this thing is?

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OR THE POOP?

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Ugh.

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2 responses

  1. I understand your frustration, I really do, so I hope what I’m about to say won’t make you angry. I was laughing my ass off by the time I got done reading this. Mainly just because I TOTALLY GET your position on Emojis, and its either laugh or cry in frustration. Also because I’m a mature grown ass adult that doesn’t find a bijillion poop emojis in a row funny, not one bit…

    Like

    1. Man, to be honest, I was laughing at *myself* as I was adding all those poops.

      Like

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