Sinuous Ocelot


So back when we were in Moscow, Nate and I visited Hastings and came across a book entitled Becoming a Supple Leopard. We weren’t quite sure what a Supple Leopard was (though I’m assuming it deserves to be capitalized), but it kind of became a little joke with us. I’d call Nate a Supple Leopard, one of us would do something and the other would say, “that’s something a Supple Leopard would do”…that kind of thing.

Anyway, tonight we decided to finally look up the book on Amazon to see if any of the reviews actually explained the “Supple Leopard” thing. But we found something better. We found this review:

Have you ever wondered what it would feel like to be as agile as the ninjas you see so often on TV? Oh, you’ve never seen a ninja?! There’s a good reason for that – they are NINJAS.
Ninjas are fast and graceful, and you always see them doing crazy things with their body that involves wicked flexibility. Where does all that flexibility come from? How do you think they recover after being beaten down by Bruce Lee, Chuck Norris, Jet Li or Jackie Chan? By reading this book, targeting their goats, smashing their psoas, freeing their matted down tissues and working out other downstream issues they become more agile and deadly than ever and recover far faster from deadly one-inch punches to the face.
Last thing to mention, is that ninjas are never in anything like a pain cave. They brave out their training and all their fights to the death. The pain cave or a pain “face” means nothing to them. Except for above mentioned deadly one-inch punch to the face. But then they’re dead.
Basically, become a leopard, become a ninja, become anything extreme and more awesome (I scribbled “Snow” above Leopard, because my spirit animal is a Snow Leopard).
Enjoy this book. But don’t. Because if you do the exercises, it will hurt. In a good way. Like if your favourite movie star crush strapped you down and ripped your pants off. But then again, you’re now a ninja – so that will never happen.

The reviewer’s username is, appropriately, “Deadly Ninja” and this is the only thing they’ve reviewed.

I love the immediate contradiction of “Oh, you’ve never seen a ninja?! There’s a good reason for that – they are NINJAS” and “Ninjas are fast and graceful, and you always see them doing crazy things with their body that involves wicked flexibility.”

How can I see them if they’re ninjas, Deadly Ninja?
HOW CAN I SEE THEM?!?!

 

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