SOUL DESTROYER


For my presentation* in my seminar class, I’m basically presenting some of the main results of my MA thesis. This has required me to dredge up this old notebook from way back when.

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This notebook brings back bad memories.

This notebook brings back thoughts of UBC.

This notebook brings back thoughts of how, every morning, I would dread going to campus with every fiber of my being.

This notebook brings back thoughts of how I would have a panic attack every Thursday because Thursday was the day I was supposed to meet with my supervisor.

This notebook brings back thoughts of how much I eventually stopped caring about school—something I hate admitting even now.

This notebook reminds me that I lost two years of my early twenties to misery, fear, dread, and depression, among other things.

This notebook brings back bad memories.

Aaaaaaaand now I’m sad.

 

*You may be asking, “if this brings back so many bad memories, why the hell are you doing your presentation on your old thesis results? Because the presentation is focused more on our presentation skills rather than the content, so it was recommended that we just use some results/ideas that we’ve come up with in the past and focus on the “presenting” part rather than try to come up with something new.

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2 responses

  1. Maybe take the cover off and put a different one on? Something that is less of a trigger? Or is it not just the cover.

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    1. Haha, it’s everything associated with my first round of grad school. But the presentation went well, so I guess it was worth it.

      Like

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