Are you serious?
GOD DAMMIT. AGAIN.
The company that I have to get into and through graduate school to work for is the very company whose test will probably be reason schools will turn me down. If it didn’t suck so horribly, I’d be laughing at the irony.
I’ve done an average of 26.6 credits per semester, with a couple of those done over the summer. I have a 4.0. I’m graduating in 37 days with my psychology degree. I have almost enough statistics background for a minor and almost enough philosophy background for a major, both of which I’m getting next semester. I have research experience. I’m co-author of an article that’s under review for publication. I have worked my ass off for the past year and a half, cramming eight semester’s worth of work into five. Why? Because I am so ready to go into the career I want that I’m willing to sacrifice everything—down time, time to hang out with friends, non-school related extracurricular activities, even my sanity (flashbacks to last semester’s finals week)—to get to a point where they’ll finally let me to the job I want to do so badly.
So what will my GRE scores tell the grad schools to which I’m applying?
They’ll tell them that I don’t know what 9 raised to the 14th power is (this was an actual question. Seriously. What is the practicality of knowing this??).
They’ll tell them that I can’t find an antonym of the word “panegyric” given a list of five words.
They’ll tell them that I can’t remember the formula for the area of a cylinder.
But you know what it won’t tell them?
That standardized tests have never once predicted my performance in academia (with my SAT scores, my undergrad GPA should apparently be about a 2.6).
That I understand statistics and enjoy them.
That I have such a passion for psychometrics that it’s all I can ever see myself doing with my life.
That I am probably the most motivated person they’ll ever meet.
It’s just very, very depressing to think of the fact that regardless of all this hard work I’ve put into my education, regardless of the stress, regardless of how desperately I want to be a psychometrician and carry out what I think is my life calling, no school will give me a second glance because I cannot perform well on a standardized test.
Fuck it.
Tra-la-la! Life is great in No Pants Land!
Remember how I said I was conflicted over majors a couple of weeks ago?
Yeah, that’s not happening anymore. Philosophy is freaking AMAZING, don’t get me wrong. But when I’m removed from the philosophy stimuli, I’m right back to the “Psychometrics is the way to go, totally” case.
Of course, I’ll probably be conflicted even more than I was last semester when Metaphysics starts up in the fall.
Yay.
ZOMG!
Guys, I think hell just froze over…the U of I is actually doing something conducive to the implementation of my plans!
Yes, that’s right! I went up to the philosophy department today to speak to an advisor (who will also be my teacher for Metaphysics next semester) about my plan for fall/spring.
Have I told you this plan? Probably, but I’ll explain it again: my plan is to graduate in the fall with my psych degree (and philosophy minor and statistics emphasis), right? Well, since grad school programs (assuming I get into one) don’t start until the fall, so I’ve essentially a semester where I won’t be doing anything. So I figured, why not do something productive and get a philosophy degree then, since with the minor I’ll only need 4 classes anyway. Well, the thing is, a philosophy major also requires 20 additional credits from another “approved field.” My question was this: could I use 20 of the credits I earned getting my psychology degree to fulfill this requirement (keep in mind I’d have already graduated with these)?
So today I get in there and explain my situation, and he said something to the effect of, “as long as the Registrar doesn’t have any restrictions, it will work fine.”
I checked with the Registrar. They don’t have any restrictions.
Translation: yes, I CAN graduate in the fall, and I CAN come back and get my second B.S. in the spring.
How incredibly awesome is that?
It nearly almost trumps my incredible worrying over the results of my two tests today.
If you don’t understand the material conditional, then the humor of this sentence is lost
Ugh. I’m conflicted. Well, that’s nothing new—what’s different this time is the fact that I’m conflicted about my career choice. Shocking, I know!
I’m really, really, really into philosophy right now, and I’m really, really, really stressing out about the statistics part of my Psychometrician plan (which is essentially the entirety of the plan). Why are these two things occurring simultaneously? Two reasons:
1. Leibniz
2. Teetering on the border between an A and a B in Sample Survey Methods
So I’m basically chalking this confliction up to the fact that I’m really enthused about a specific philosopher we’re studying while being way too stressed out over one of my stats classes. I’m not going to give in to this confliction. I don’t think I could build a philosophy teaching career around a single man I’m obsessed with (though if a university would let me teach a class solely on Leibniz, that would be AMAZING), and I don’t think a single stats class should intimidate me to the point where I’m willing to give up the career that sounds like it was made for me.
So yeah. Just thought I needed to talk (or write) that out so I could put it in stone.
As much as Leibniz rocks my socks, I love psychometrics. It’s what I was born to do.
But if I could do both at some point in my life, that would be freaking awesome.
Fun with the Tarot
I found my old little tarot deck today, so I decided to give it a shot, once concentrating on the future of my education and then on—just for giggles—love.
Here we go!
First Reading: Education
Present Position (immediate circumstances): “Use your head and not your heart. Exercise restraint; hold your power in reserve” (hmm…I believe I’m in the process of using my head and not my heart.)
Immediate Influences (obstacles and/or influences): “Disordered, illogical, or rebellious thinking” (aw hell!)
Goal or Destiny (goal and expectation): “Indicates a desire for independence” (This is one of my goals…don’t know if it’s related to my education or not. But if it’s in regard to financial independence, then yeah, it’s related.)
Distant Past Foundation (how the current situation came about): “Top of your game; tough and excellent manager” (I must admit, I think I was at the top of my game during spring of this year. Fall, though, is questionable).
Recent Past Events (what forms the underpinnings of the current attitude): Takes responsibilities seriously and finishes what they start” (very, very true.)
Future Influence (influences in the near future): “A tumultuous relationship has too many ups and downs” (crap, not a relationship!)
About the Questioner (how the questioner feels about the current situation): “Decisions will be made fairly” (I wonder if this regards their letting me take 25 credits next semester…)
Environmental Factors (affecting people and outside factors): “New possibilities and ideas abound.” (Woo-hoo!)
Inner Emotions (fears and wishes): “You are working hard, but more consistent effort is needed” (I do often fear that my efforts are not enough.)
Final Result (ultimate outcome if things continue on their present course): “Success may be delayed” (NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!)
Second Reading: Love (this’ll be good)
Present Position (immediate circumstances): “Highly analytical, often pursuing a career” (true, true. No love in sight.)
Immediate Influences (obstacles and/or influences): “You are jaded and bored of life” (I want to loooooooove!)
Goal or Destiny (goal and expectation): “Neglects responsibilities, keeping up appearances regardless of circumstances” (that’s disturbing and depressing.)
Distant Past Foundation (how the current situation came about): “Powers stronger than yours are at work. An impostor is found out” (ha! Hahaha! Oh…wow.)
Recent Past Events (what forms the underpinnings of the current attitude): “It is not what it appears to be” (hmm…)
Future Influence (influences in the near future): “You are jealous when crossed and fickle in your affections” (me? Fickle in my affections? Never!)
About the Questioner (how the questioner feels about the current situation): “Beware of traps” (boy, that’s for sure.)
Environmental Factors (affecting people and outside factors): “Are you squandering money needlessly?” (haha, some future lover will find my eBay obsession horrid!)
Inner Emotions (fears and wishes): “Oh, bright beginnings! Is it the heady start of a love affair?” (oh god, there’s only one person this can pertain to…)
Final Result (ultimate outcome if things continue on their present course): “You feel remorse over a severed relationship” (haha…I’m screwed.)
Now, most importantly: do I believe in the Tarot? I don’t know. I don’t think so, but I am, unfortunately, a superstitious type, though through all rational thought, it makes no sense to me that a deck of special cards could tell about my future and/or my present. But who knows?
It’s fun, regardless.
A blog solely about school (feel free to bypass this one)
As the title says, this blog is entirely about school, so you can stop reading now if you like.
Okay?
Okay.
So I totally rocked the socks off the first tests in my Tests and Measurements class on Tuesday. Highest grade in the class. You have no idea how good it feels to know that you may actually be good at what you want to do with your life (and you beat a bunch of seniors and a few grad students). Plus it was the little ego and confidence boost that I’ve needed practically this whole month. God, this month has sucked. But more on that later.
Next item of business: grad school! So far I’ve found a total of FOUR schools that offer a PhD in psychometrics. How sad is that? But anyways, as good as the University of Minnesota sounds (and it sounds GOOD), Fordham University in New York City sounds good as well. This is probably due to the fact that they have a list of required classes, and these classes are basically very specific courses on very specific topics, such as psychometric theory and ANOVA. Dream come true!
But can you seriously see me in New York? I can’t. But I will be applying to every single school I can find (all four of them), so we’ll wait and see which one (if any) I get in to. Then decisions will be made.
Wee.
Love, thy name is z-score
Now I’m not one to cuss much, but goddamn FUCK I love my Tests and Measurements class!!
I know I’ve blogged about this like five times, but I’m so freaking excited about it! I have found my true calling in life. If people are meant to have a sole purpose, I’m 99.99999% sure mine is to be a psychometrician and to make my change in the world through that. It’s a glorious thing to know something with such certainty.
As willing as I am to work my butt off for every single class I have, I’m 500% more willing to work for Tests and Measurements.
More determined than ever. Watch the hell out.
BUT…
Here’s the thing. I think I’ve discovered another very strong passion of mine—philosophy. I’ve never used to like philosophy; it was the one thing I wanted to stay away from. But thanks to my Literature of Western Civilization II class last semester, I’ve discovered the wonderful world of the ancient thinkers. And the addition of my glorious History of Ancient/Medieval Philosophy class this semester makes me consider more than I probably should be considering at this point switching out my minors for a major in philosophy (plus a few classes in the Greek language). But I won’t, because that would be impractical.
Maybe I’ll get a second Bachelor’s in philosophy while working for my Master’s and PhD at whatever grad school I happen to go to.
And I’ve decided that if for some strange reason my getting out of here in three years is not possible (no idea why that would be, considering I could get my requirements for my Bachelor’s done by next semester), I’m saying “screw it” and getting a triple major in Psychology, Philosophy, and Statistics.
That’s right, I’m either in here for a short while or in here for a very long while
I’m probably boring you now.
…I need help, don’t I?
UPDATE: there are weirdoes out there like me! And they’re on Facebook!
If a sound falls in a tree and no one is around, does it make a forest?
These are my life goals at the moment. Let’s see how many of them I can accomplish. They are in no particular order.
-Write several award-winning books
-Win a Nobel Prize
-Go to Antarctica
-Get a tattoo
-Get into a good grad school
-Make a global impact regarding global warming
-Get a Ph.D
-Get a 4.0 straight through college
-Win a Pulitzer
-Complete my bachelor’s and three minors in three years
-Go skydiving
-Do research in Antarctica
-Get another one of my plays produced
-Create a new, more accurate I.Q. test (using my Super Awesome Quantitative and -Qualitative Psychometric Ph.D!)
-Be remembered by millions when I die
These are the ones I can think of now. I’ll update this later.
a+b=f and f=9, therefore a=693. Pure logic right there.
Piss on a stick! I’m screwed for grad school. My school of choice, the University of Minnesota (where they offer both a master’s AND a Ph.D in qualitative and quantitative psychology) had a total of 512 people submit applications last year. And guess how many got in? 40. I. Am. So. Screwed.
There are only a few schools in the United States that even offer a Ph.D in QQP, so now the possibilities are further opened for me, meaning I could go to:
-The University of Minnesota
-Ohio State University
-The University of Nebraska-Lincoln
-The University of Kansas
-The University of North Carolina
-The University of Georgia
Wee.
The Pitcher in the Sourdough
Hello people! Guess what I’m doing today with some money from my first paycheck? I’m starting an Antarctica fund. That’s right, I’m saving up to get my butt down to Terra Incognita.
Haha, yeah. Just thought you’d like to know. Plus, it’s late, I’m tired, and I don’t have anything else to write about. More tomorrow. Promise.
Kudos if you got the reference of the title…or rather, what the title is making fun of.
Career-a-size Me, Cap’n!
Okay.
So I’ve decided, I think, what I specifically want to do in the field of psychology. I know the majority of people majoring in psychology want to do clinical work. I, on the other hand, want to stay as far away from it as possible.
I’ve always had a thing with data and statistics—I like to analyze data, check correlations, and find percentages (what a total nerd, eh?). So I figure I want to go into quantitative and psychometric psychology, which basically deals with the design, execution, and validity of tests and the data received from said tests (tests being IQ, personality, and achievement tests for the most part). It sounds like stuff I’d like to do. Plus the $200,000 a year salary sounds pretty good, too.
[subject]
Bwahahaha! It’s time to change my plans again! So I figured out that getting a major and three minors will be faster than getting two majors, so here’s my new plan:
I’m sticking with my psychology major, cause I love, it, and switching my English major to an English minor while adding a philosophy minor and a history minor.
Yeah.
This is my new plan and I’m sticking with it. If I keep up this pace, I’ll be out of here in three years with a bachelor’s in psychology and three minors, and I think that’s pretty damn good.
Ambitious or insane? You be the judge.
No, wait.
I’ll be the judge.
You just sit there and look pretty.
Waiter! There’s a Freudian in my Id!
Once again, I am questioning what I should do in regards to my major(s). I want to get the hell out of the U of I (meaning I want to get my bachelor’s degree in psych) in at most four years (but preferably three), but I also don’t want to limit my choice of other majors/minors because of that. Originally, I was a Psychology/Theatre/Music major, then a Psychology/Theatre major, and now a Psychology/English (with an emphasis in writing) major. Now I’m wondering whether or not to drop the English major and, in its place, minor in (all at the same time):
1. Writing. It’s basically the same thing as English, only it’s a minor and takes less time.
2. History. Cause I’m already halfway to a minor, anyway.
3. Philosophy. You know how I’ve always hated philosophy? Well, yeah. I like it now.
4. Possibly geology. Cause it only takes three classes to get a minor.
Noooo clue what I’m gonna do. None.
Help?
Eigenblogger 