So as probably none of you know, I recently came into contact with an old friend from 7th grade. It was weird—early last week he randomly popped into my head and I thought, “I wonder what ever happened to Ross?” and then last Thursday I get a call from my dad—Ross had called him (sometimes it’s a good thing when at least someone in my family is able to keep the same phone number for more than 5 years) and dad gave me all his contact info.
Now we’re friends on Facebook and we talk on Messenger on occasion. He’s pretty much exactly the same, which is good to know ‘cause he was blind and insane and really awesome to hang with in 7th grade and is apparently still blind and insane and really awesome to IM.
Apparently I’m still the same, too. We spent the other night talking about the old Knowledge Bowl competitions we “participated in” solely because it meant we got to go to McDonald’s and then goof around on the bus to the competition/at the competition/on the bus back from the competition.
A few more memories passed between us, and then he said this: “You never seemed very happy, still breaks my heart to think about.”
This kinda surprised me. Really? I didn’t ever seem very happy? Back in junior high, when all I had to worry about was stalking Patrick learning how to type and not getting my thumb sawed off in shop class?
I find that very…disconcerting.
Do those of you who know me now find me unhappy? Am I like this harbinger of depression or something? ‘Cause I certainly don’t remember being Emo Central in 7th grade (that was 8th grade, but I was on meds and they killed my soul, among other things) but apparently that’s how I came across. There’s a lot more shit going down in my life right now than there was back then, but aside from the occasional “I HATE MY LIFE” blog—and let’s be honest, who doesn’t have those every once and awhile?—I don’t think I’m all that unhappy-sounding.
Meh. Probably overanalyzing it. I’M GONNA GO WRITE DEPRESSING POETRY NOW WOO!
Today’s song: Vancouver City (featuring Linda Ganzini) by Innerlife Project
Eigenblogger 
Not at all, it seems to me that, like you said, you have your up and down moments, but I wouldn’t say you never seem happy. I would say you seem to have a lot of constant stress.
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