Dear Vancouver Ice Cream Truck:


You are fucking weird.

Every other weekend I debate your existence with myself. I’ve never actually seen you, just heard you. Perhaps you’re just something my mind concocted in order to keep me preoccupied, but, equally likely, you are a real ice cream truck.
And I’m making the assumption that you are, in fact, an ice cream truck. I’ve wanted to see you, but never have been able to, as you practically gun down 31st street as if you had weed instead of ice cream in your truck, thus destroying any hope of me catching a glimpse of you due to my gate practically molding shut (yeah, I know, gross) overnight.

The weed honestly wouldn’t surprise me, however, as this IS Canada.  “Kids, hurry up, the weed truck is driving down the street!”

I think the driver just wants to keep whatever he’s supposed to be selling to himself, so only those who can run 30 mph deserve ice cream/weed.

Also, what vehicles other than an ice cream/weed trucks would blast the Barnum & Bailey Circus music? Except, of course, vehicles that escape from the Barnum & Bailey Circus, but I doubt that happens every Saturday and Sunday between 11 AM and noon.

Peh.

 

Today’s song: Music from the film Ogniem i Mieczem by Obrona Zbaraża

What sayest thou? Speak!