I’m going to do my doctorate thesis on antitheses!


Yes, I did go through and correct the double i’s that whoever wrote this survey deemed necessary to put into every word containing an i.

LONGEST FEMALE SURVEY EVER
*don’t be shy, fill it all out*

Do you sleep in your bra?
Nope.

Do you enjoy drama?
Plays? Yes. The “OMG ur such a bitch i’m goign 2 rip ur hair out!!!111”? No.

Are you a girly girl?
Nah, I wouldn’t say so. Being female is fun, but ONLY ON OCCASION.

Last person you hugged?
Rob, I think.

Small or BIG purses?
NO purses! Purses SUCK!

Do you think you’re conceited?
I don’ think so.

Do you dress up on Halloween?
Not usually, but I did go as Claude last Halloween.

Are you double jointed?
Haha, nope.

Where is the weirdest place you have slept?
That’s a good question. I don’t know.

Has anyone touched/smacked your butt?
It’s called Marching Band. Actually, it’s called Beau the Pervert, but it usually goes on during marching band, so I’m calling it that.

Last person who u hung out with?
The random assortment of people at the table.

Do you call anybody by their last name?
Nope.

How many guys will read this just because it says Lady Survey?
No idea.

Do you wear makeup?
Foundation and eye shadow. Oh, and blue mascara, lately.

Ever cried at a movie theater?
I don’t think so.

Can you put mascara on without opening your mouth?
Easily.

Do you think Ryan Sheckler is cute?
Who?

Have you ever been called a bad influence?
Oh, probably.

 

THIS OR THAT:
Eyeliner or Mascara?
Mascara.

Louis Vuitton or Dooney?
Again, who?

American Eagle or Hollister?
Never worn either.

Heels or flats?
I can live with flats.

Skirts or jeans?
Jeans suck, so skirts.

Socks or leggings?
SOCKS!

Hoodies or jackets?
Neither! Nudity!

Heels or sneakers?
Sneakers.

Straight or curly hair?
I wish mine was straight.

Hoops or dangling earrings?
Hoops AND dangly in the SAME EARRINGS! OMG.

Do you prefer light or dark haired guys?
Doesn’t matter.

Are you currently frustrated with a guy?
Nah.

Do you have a best friiend?
I guess you could call them that, we chat for like four hours a night.

Have you ever had your heart broken?
Once.

Have you ever thought of having plastic surgery?
Yes, but I don’t think I’d ever do it.

Do you like your life?
Depends on how my GPA is standing. Yes, GPA does matter to me that much right now. Deal with it.

Has your ex boyfriend ever gone out with one of your friends?
Yeah, but I probably would have never met her if he hadn’t, so I don’t know what answer that qualifies as.

Have you ever jumped in the pool with your clothes on?
Nope.

Have you ever slapped a boy in the face?
Nope.

Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?
Haha, like every night last semester.

Have you ever not been able to get someone off of your mind?
Oh yes. They’re on it right now, in fact.

Have you ever had a good feeling about something?
Yes, but it turned out bad in the end. Don’t trust your intuition, it’s evil.

Do you ever wish you were famous?
Yes, that would be nice. But famous as in “Nobel Prize-winning” famous, not “Britney Spears is insane” famous.

Are you currently missing someone?
Nah.
IN A BOY:
Cowboy or Gangster?
Haha, neither.

Preppy or Punk/Goth?
Punk/Goth is fun

Well-educated or Dropout?
Well-educated.

Anything Cute or Abercrombie?
Haha, like I pay attention to what anyone else wears.

Contacts or Glasses?
Whatever they prefer. As long as they can see.

Funny or Serious?
Either one is good, but so long as they know how to act the opposite on occasion.

Romantic or Daredevil?
Romantic. I’m a sucker for romance, believe it or not.

Cute or Hot?
Smart. HA!

Good Dancer or Good Singer?
Don’t care.

Smoker or Non-smoker?
I’d say non-.

Has a Motorcycle or Has a Sports Car?
A car. They’re more versatile (not THAT way, perverts!).

What sayest thou? Speak!

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