(Really, stop me if my titles get too “out there.”)

 World, I present to you a new metaphysical theory on God and the universe.

 In a sentence:
It is through Ren’s boobs that God is represented.

 Elaboration:
We looked at this through three different philosophical viewpoints (actually I did, everyone else there extrapolated, laughed, or was like “Claudia, what the hell?”)—Descartes, Spinoza, and Leibniz (the Rationalists!).

 Descartes
We have to establish some sort of dualism. This task is easily accomplished, due to the fact that there are two boobs. One boob is to represent the substance “mind,” and the other boob is to represent the “material” substance. “I think therefore I’m Ren’s boobs.”

 Spinoza
We are Ren’s boobs, and Ren’s boobs are us. Everything is Ren’s boobs. Ren’s boobs are the cause of all things. There is no dualism; the boobs themselves are of the same substance. Oh, and Ren’s boobs can indeed be perceived and understood.

 Leibniz
Ren’s boobs are the best of all possible boobs. They are perfectly omnipotent, omnipresent, and good. Ren’s boobs created the world. Therefore, it is because of Ren’s boobs that we live in the best of all possible worlds. There is no other and better world, just as there are no other and better boobs.

Yeah.