Alright you NERD BASKETS, all of this year’s City Connect uniforms are out,* so let’s update the thingy.

I’m not going to repeat all my rankings from the previous post I did, but let’s just mention the new ones (which I’ve outlined in red in the above pic).

Tampa Bay Rays

I freaking love these, yo. There’s a skateboarding ray on them, what more can you want? The only reason these don’t beat out the Padres is because 1) those Padres colors are fire, and 2) the number on the back of the jersey is really hard to see from far away. If the outline were thicker and/or in lime green, they’d be perfect.

New York Mets

I think this is a really good jersey. I like the purple touches and all the little meanings behind the smaller details that you maybe can’t see from the picture. Also, I’m, y’know, a little biased.

Cleveland Guardians

Eh. They’re not bad. I like the font and that funky texturing.

Detroit Tigers

Why are they blue?

This looks like something a middle-aged dad would wear to go bowling. I guess it does kind of look like the wearer got run over, so…yeah. MOTOR CITY

Philadelphia Phillies

The two things I absolutely never think of when I think of the city of Philadelphia are 1) the color blue, and 2) a serial killer font. That 7 looks like a pipe wrench. I know they put the Liberty Bell on the hat, but come on. A gold/copper jersey with a big-ass black lightning-shaped crack going down the front of it would be so much more iconic.

St. Louis Cardinals

LOL “The Lou.” Apparently it’s a thing, and it’s like the only thing different about this City Connect Jersey compared to their usual ones. Do they have to put those damn birds on everything? Are they like glued to the bat? Put the birds on “The Lou” or, better yet, do what that Photoshop-wielding guy on Twitter did and put a giant toilet on the front and perch the birds on that.
(They’re still better than those god-awful Marlins jerseys, though.)

The end.

*Except for the Dodger’s second iteration, but I have a feeling it will be just as boring as the first one**

**IT LOOKS LIKE THEY ROLLED IN FUNFETTI CAKE. WHAT IN THE SHIT, DODGERS