Life is meaningless, so who freaking cares anyway, right?

Salt & vinegar, barbecue, sour cream & onion, or cheddar? 
Salt and vinegar, baby! THE BURRRRRRRRN

Bow ties on guys, dorky or adorable? 
Meh. I don’t really have an opinion either way.

What are your thoughts on mini-skirts or mini-dresses? 
They’re…things? I look terrible in them, but most people look great in them.

Have you ever died in one of your dreams? 
LOLOLOLOLOL WELCOME TO MY REM PARTY, WANNA DIE WITH ME?

Name three things you hate having to buy for yourself: Why? 
Um…I like looking at clothes, but I hate having to try them on.
Makeup at stores that are any fancier than Walmart. I feel like I’m being judged on what I buy and I feel like the cashiers are thinking “no makeup can fix that amount of ugly, honey.”
Haircuts? I have to talk to someone and tell them what I want. Then I have to pretend that I like it.

Which is tastier: fruity gum or minty gum? 
I’ve never really liked mint.

Quick! The first professional sports player you can think of: 
Max Scherzer!

Be honest, have you ever bullied anybody? Who was it? 
I don’t think I’ve ever bullied anyone. I’m probably wrong, unfortunately, but I can’t recall any incidents.

What colors look best with navy blue in your opinion? 
Orange. Yellow. Brown.

What is the cutest Halloween costume for a baby to wear?  
Eh.

Is it a turn-off if somebody’s teeth are stained yellow? 
There are so many more important things about another person than the color of their teeth.

Which of your friends is the tallest? Which of them is the shortest? 
I don’t have any friends.

Plaid, polka-dots, stripes, or stars: pick three. 
Stars, polka-dots, stripes, in that order.

Do you know any quotes from Forrest Gump? 
Apart from the obvious one? “Pray with me, Forrest. Pray with me.”

Do you believe in demonic possession? How about ghosts? Angels? 
I don’t believe in demonic possession or angels, but I believe in the idea of ghosts existing at least in some sort of form.

Would you rather judge a singing or dancing competition? Why? 
Singing, just because I know absolutely nothing about dance.

What appliance in your kitchen do you use the most often?
The microwave.

What cabinet or closet in your house do you rarely open? 
The one with all my old knee-high socks in them. I just wear my walking/running socks now.

What was the mascot at your elementary school? 
I think we were the St. Mary’s Lions, but our true mascot was OUR LORD AND SAVIOR

What is the most expensive restaurant you’ve ever been to? Was it good? 
Probably NoTAble when I was being interviewed for that limited term instructor position at U of C. It was really good.

Have you ever fallen down in public? Did anybody see you? 
I’ve bit it on the snow/ice a few times up here.

Do you scream when you go on rollercoasters? Do you close your eyes? 
It’s been a LONG TIME since I’ve been on a rollercoaster. Screaming is tradition, yo.

Do you think home-made cards are better than store bought ones? 
Don’t care either way.

What is one romantic movie that you enjoy enough to watch more than once? 
Does Titanic count? Though personally, I’m more about the sinking than the romance.