Haha, best YouTube video description ever: “Steve… in drag… dancing to Journey and eating Oreo’s. But hey, it’s okay… we’re Catholic!!”

I’ve officially realized that I suck incredibly at Flash. The evidence for this claim is really very simple.
Total Flash endeavors that are still saved on my computer: 19
Total Flash endeavors carried out until completion: 3
Success rate: 15%.
It’s a sad, sad, world.

I’ve also officially realized that I suck at poetry. I don’t do poetry by choice much anymore (mainly because—hey—I suck), but the poetry I’ve done in the past is so horribly horrible that it’s worth a good laugh. Though I’ve been published a few times, I think this work of genius that got me in considerable trouble in 4^th grade (conservative catholic school, people) is my best piece of poetry ever:

There once was a tart
Who learned how to fart
And stunk up the whole neighborhood.
Then there was a time
When he learned to rhyme
And farted as loud as he could.
He shook all the buildings, structures, and towers
He wilted the weeds, grasses, and flowers.
He made the fish die, salmon and basses
He made people faint with his powerful gasses.
Some army men died
And most their wives cried
And buried them under dead grasses.

Pretty good for fourth grade shenanigans, eh? I’m proud of this piece of poetic contraband that caused a great fuss once it got outside the fourth grade classroom.

I suck at life, too. Really. It’s because I’m so silly and enjoy using phrases such as “poetic contraband” though they don’t really make all that much sense.

Further realizations: Futurama is the best animated series ever. And Mystery Science Theatre 3000 is a great place to go for silly quotes. And general overall humor.

‘Ta!