So I’ve been working at Wendy’s for three weeks now. This is what I’ve learned:

1. Paychecks rock (I knew this already, it’s just been reaffirmed).
2. When our boss gives everyone roses, the night goes well.
3. It is possible to quote the entire movie Dodgeball in one night and have each quote be extremely relevant to the conversation at hand.
4. “Charlie the Unicorn” has infiltrated everything.
5. Latex gloves filled with water = fun times.
6. If you want to score some strange looks at WinCo, go in there at midnight and by a head of lettuce and nothing else. If you want even stranger looks, stand in front of the lettuce display for five minutes before making your selection.
7. When it’s 3 o’clock in the morning and you’re trying to play Scrabble online, it doesn’t matter what the word “orally” (pronounced “o-RALLY”) means as long as it’s a valid word (it wasn’t until the next morning that I realized what I really was spelling and that the emphasis should go on the FIRST syllable. Dork.)
8. I don’t keep a clean back area, I keep a “freakishly clean” and a “holy shit, that’s clean” back area.
9. Having your hands in warm soapy water for basically 7 hours straight really makes them nice and soft.
10. People who claim they are “crazy” are usually the most normal of the whole group. It’s the ones that never mention insanity that you have to worry about (*cough*Sean*cough*).
11. This just in: a tomato slicer SLICES stuff! Who would’ve guessed?! We all had a big joke at the expense of this one guy who was picking up the tomato slicer and the little slicer part fell out and he was all, “whoa, it slices!”
12. Sanitizer doesn’t kill a fly.
13. Neither does apathetically swatting at it with a towel.
14. Standing there saying, “hey guys, there’s a fly on the ceiling” doesn’t do much either.
15. Do not challenge a teenage boy’s masculinity by offering to kill a fly for him.

Haha, yeah. It’s fun.