Because I’m a slacker, I didn’t go to Polya at all this week.

So I went today. I’m sitting on the aisle end of one of the rows of computers, and in the row across the aisle from me, there are these two stereotypical preppy chicks and one guy. He’s a relatively good looking guy—he doesn’t have the rippling abs thing going on, nor is he overweight—he’s just “average”, but a good kind of average. He is obviously into one of the girls, and she is obviously into him, because they’re freaking fondling each other’s tonsils with their tongues from the moment I got in there to the moment the guy got up to leave. After he leaves, the other girl (the one who wasn’t getting his tongue stuck down her throat) turns to her friend and says, “so I guess you and him are, like, really serious now?” And she goes, “Yeah…but it would be so much better if he weren’t so fat.”

…what??

What the flip-flying hell does that mean? She thinks the relationship would be better IF HE CHANGED PHYSICALLY? Who the hell does this chick think she is? I almost went over there and bitch-slapped the little whore into the next century. I HATE people like this. I HATE it when people criticize other people’s bodies. What the hell do they know about the people they are criticizing? Frick. This chick really pissed me off. If she can only “get serious” about him if he had rippling abs and a super tan, THEN SHE FREAKING SHOULD RETHINK HER STUPID RELATIONSHIP, because it’s obviously one based just a little too much on the physical. Anyway, I’m sure, if he remained her boyfriend, he’d lose weight in no time, seeing as how he’d have to run to buy her lattes from Starbucks or more trailer-trash hair highlighting crap from beauty stores or pregnancy test kits from Rite-Aid every three days. Dear GOD. Honestly, if the physical part is really bothering her, she should talk to him in private (if at all; personally I think she should get a clue that not every man comes directly from a flippin’ J. Crew magazine) and not talk to her preppy friends about him behind his back, cause if she’s gonna do that to him, that makes her scum and she doesn’t deserve the guy. She should just pull her low-rise, ugly, conformist jeans up over her butt crack, close her damn compact for once in her vain, look-driven life, and SHUT THE HELL UP.

GOD.

Okay.

Rant over.

Back to normal.