So last night I had this dream in which I was hanging out with Euler. We were talking about rainbows or something for like 30 minutes when suddenly he was gone and I was in this big auction house.

I sit down and watch. The auctioneer gets to this one paper and he says, “This is a theorem by Euler, but he forgot it on the bus so we took it and are selling it here. He’s very smart, so you’d better bid high!”

I thought in the dream, “Wow, how cool would it be to have that? I could pretend it’s mine and just erase his name from it!”

(Dream Claudia is vastly less academically honest than Reality Claudia, just to let you all know.)

So I bid like $50,000 on it and since I’m so excited I don’t open the paper until I get home. I make sure Euler’s not around, unfold the paper, and read the following:

“Theory: dogs bark.
Proof: barking dogs.”

And I got SO FREAKING MAD that I spent $50,000 on that. I think I was about to go beat the crap out of Euler but my alarm woke me up first.

Uh…