This is probably the strangest survey I’ve come across, so of course I had to fill it out:

NAME:
Claudia

5 THINGS YOU CAN DO WITH A BRICK:
1. Build with it
2. Chuck it at an enemy
3. Hump it
4. Use it to smash one Christmas light in a long series of Christmas lights that are connected to a electrical converter that is hooked to a quarter welded to a snakeskin that has been coated with a special metal alloy that enables it to transmit nuclear energy through the air to a reciever on the hood of a time-warping machine that allows you to go back to the time to prevent said brick from ever being made.
5. Stand on it to create the illusion of height!

I WANT TO LEARN HOW TO:
Use a brick to smash one Christmas light in a long series of Christmas lights that are connected to a electrical converter that is hooked to a quarter welded to a snakeskin that has been coated with a special metal alloy that enables it to transmit nuclear energy through the air to a reciever on the hood of a time-warping machine that allows you to go back to the time to prevent said brick from ever being made.

IF YOU HAD TO BE STRANDED ON A DESERT ISLAND WITH AN INFAMOUS CRIMINAL (DEAD OR ALIVE), WHO WOULD IT BE?
Hitler! Definitely Hitler.
Note: me choosing Hitler as the criminal I’d like to spend time with on a desert island does not make me a Hitler activist. Jeez.

BARNEY THE PURPLE DINOSAUR VS. A VELOCIRAPTOR: WHO WOULD WIN?
It’s all a question of stamina. Will barney be able to withstand the disemboweling longer than the velociraptor will be able to withstand the “I love you…you love me…” song?
Yeah. My vote’s on Barney.

HOW DO YOU THROW AWAY A GARGABE CAN?
Duh! You throw it in the…
…oh.
Fail.

ITS TIME TO VOTE. THE OPPOSING PARTY OFFERS YOU $100 TO VOTE FOR THEM, AND WILL KNOW IF YOU ACTUALLY WENT THROUGH WITH IT. DO YOU ACCEPT?
The opposing party in this case is the Republican Party. So no way in hell.

IF PRESIDENT BUSH WAS A TYPE OF FOOD, WHAT FOOD WOULD HE BE?
A dodo meat burger.
No question.

HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS:
You mean I could make my own? Wow…this could take awhile…
I must think on this.