# The Missing Shade of AWESOME

God, I love Hume.

Now that I’m an actual factual philosophy grad student, I think it’s time we revisited this website. And in the spirit of Hume:

Mr. Vandewalker’s comment, “Look! Hume’s pants are the missing shade of blue!” made me laugh SO HARD when I first read it.

ALSO: I am in a severe music rut, which is bad for this “download a new song every day” business. So friends, neighbors, subscribers, random blog passers-by, could you please suggest some songs for me? I’ll listen to anything at least once.
I’m also thinking of adding a page that actually lists all the songs I’ve downloaded for 2010/2011, so look for that in the next few days if you’re interested at all.
Okay, that’s it.

# I Love Uncyclopedia

is great. Spent the night browsing it, feel substantially better than I did this afternoon.

From the “glossary of mathematical terms” section:
Absolute Value: The price of a bottle of vodka.
Cartesian Coordinates: Coordinates that one thinks are correct, therefore they must be…
Decagon: The cards are missing.
Euler’s Formula: The squeaky wheel gets the grease.
Infinity: A big fuckin’ number

From the “statistics” page:
“In the meantime, you should have a look at some FUCKIN POLLS (1/5) “

“Type I Error: Getting statistically significant results.
Type II Error: Getting statistically significant results, lying about the results, and getting caught.
Type III Error: Getting statistically significant results and forgetting to write them down.
Type IV Error: Getting a type I, II, or III error and not realizing it.
Type V Error: You have no fucking idea what you’re doing, do you?”

Newton’s page is practically all about apples. It’s freaking hilarious.
“Four years later, Newton presented his thesis, On The Scrumptiousness Of Apples, to the university. Due to the prevailing low standards in science at the time, it was accepted and Newton graduated.”

“Newton was distraught and flew immediately into a violent rage. He ran into the local market and turned over a cartload of apples shouting, ‘run my pretties, I have freed you!’ This is believed to be the origin of the popular saying ‘upsetting the apple cart’ as well as the less well known phrase ‘don’t go mad and start humping apples like Newton did.’”

And Hume:
“Showing his potential from an early age, he had disproved the existence of God, society, and Asia while still a mere toddler, and the existence of over 30% of all known objects by his eighth birthday. Aristotle had not even learnt to tie his shoe-laces until he was nine.”

I still think Vancouver’s page is the most hilarious thing ever, but Surrey’s article is like 100% accurate. “The city’s current motto is ‘for the love of God, stay the fuck out!’

Today’s song: Ellens Gesang III, D. 839 [Ave Maria] by Barbara Bonney & Geoffrey Parsons

# Pixel Philosophers

Alternate title: “Things Claudia Does to Avoid Homework/Cleaning Her Room/Death by Boredom/Drugs”

So this morning I woke up and put on my new snazzy David Hume shirt. After playing Rock Band for a bit, I sat down at about 4:00 with the intent to do a quick sketch of Hume in Flash, just to check my skills how much I suck.
I just finished. It’s 9:30.

FRUIT OF MY LABORS:

Yes, I know the shirt and the wig suck (I forgot to shade a few places…shut up, it’s the first time I’ve drawn ANYTHING in a long while, especially in Flash). But look at that lace neckerchief…damn.

Now he’s glowing with the help of Photoshop.

# To Hume am I Speaking?

How FREAKING BADASS IS THIS SHIRT?!

It’s mine. I love it.

# Claudia’s Top 5 Sexiest Men of the Enlightenment

Here are five instances where beauty and brains do occur simultaneously. Also, I adore the fashion of this era.
(2-years-later-retrospective-observation: HOLY CRAP, I posted this on Leibniz’ birthday!)

1. This man wears the best of all possible wigs, and he wears it well. Leibniz did everything—mathematics, linguistics, philosophy, logic, engineering, law, natural science—you name a topic, he probably dabbled in it. Polymathy is hot, and so are ostentatious wigs.

Eye candy AND brain candy.

2. Anyone who knows me knows that I think Voltaire is the sexiest man ever to live. I slobbered all over Candide when I first read it, and I see it as a proof of God that such wit could be combined with such good looks.

He can satire his way into my heart any day.

3. It feels fundamentally wrong to me to have Leibniz and Newton inhabiting the same list, but you have to admit—the guy looks badass. Setting aside the calculus issue, there are very few things Newton can’t take at least some credit for in the world of science. Plus, he shoved a darning needle behind his eye and moved it around to see if it distorted his vision. That’s dedication.

“I am the CALCULATOR…I will divide you by zero!”

4. Hume has a very confident look about him. And why shouldn’t he? After all, he did—single-handedly—take down the notions of induction and causation. And he did it while looking good. That jacket looks very sexy on him.